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I don't know if Vanderbilt came to town today with the intention of losing, but after watching them play, I can't say otherwise. They acted like they knew that they were outclassed by this Georgia team and hadn't considered any way to win. The Dores played us hard last year, but just didn't seem to have their heart in it tonight. It was, quite frankly, sad to watch as UGA quickly steamed their way to a 48-3 win.

Otherwise, it was a beautiful evening. The air was cool, the crowd enthusiastic and friendly. I attended the game with Dad, his first UGA game since his foot surgery last August. I enjoyed king-sized pretzel and a Coca-Cola as we heckled the Vanderbilt band ("The Spirit of Gold"). Some of our old season ticket holding seat neighbors had even returned. It was a good day for a ball game. Too bad the opponent didn't show up.

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It's been a bad week. It started with cable and internet outages. Then Zipper was put down. My new drivers license has the worst photo in history. Kelley's bulldog Big Mac died. I got a stomach bug. And Wriphe.com has now run into some technical problems that has had it down most of the past 48 hours. All of these things have one thing in common: I chose not to go to the UGA football game last Saturday. I will not make that mistake again!

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We euthanized my father's German Shorthaired Pointer, Zipper, yesterday at about 6PM. Zipper was 11-1/2 years old, a ripe old age for her breed. Earlier this summer she was diagnosed with the diabetes that would destroy her liver, kidneys, and thyroid. The poor girl wasn't in good shape at the end. Which isn't to say that she was ever really in "good" shape to begin with.

Dad originally bought Zipper second-hand, as her original owner found high-strung Zipper to be too much of a handful. Zipper was intended as pet for Chere, but that never quite worked out. Even as a young dog, Zip was neurotic enough to consider a pencil lying on the floor to be the equivalent of an electrified fence. In her need for order, she ended up being more of a tattle-tale on Chere's frequent mischief than a playmate. Though Chere tolerated Zipper, our first poodle was never really keen on having a stool pigeon for a pack mate.

Zipper was always skittish and was once full of nervous energy, hence the name Trey gave her. She never had full control of her hind legs, and they tended to vibrate at high speed when she was excited. Her hind claws could tap out something of a racket as she impatiently watched the clock hands work their way towards treat time.

Once the diabetes was diagnosed, treat-time lost a lot of its meaning. I can't think it much of a coincidence that not too long after we took away the very thing that gave her days meaning, Zipper finally gave up the ghost. She knew that some things just aren't worth living for.

She was a good dog, and I loved her.

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Think this year's Presidential election is turning into a circus? I just read in The New York Times that 5 different politicians calling themselves "Batman" are running for office in Brazil. It seems to me that these people aren't really familiar with the concept of urban vigilantism. What's the point of electing someone with a history of refusing to work within the system? You might as well vote Libertarian.

Apparently, it's the norm for candidate in Brazil to run on gimmicks and nicknames that would make even Stephen Colbert blanch. The only catch is that candidates are required by law to chose a nom de politique that is somehow related to the candidate's familiar nickname. Are there really 5 men in Brazilian politics who get called "Batman" on a daily basis? I'd like to hope that their nicknames come from sleeping upside-down rather than dressing up as bats. They do say that politics makes strange bedfellows, after all.

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Sorry, no post yesterday, but I have an excuse.

See, I was going to go to the UGA game versus Florida Atlantic University with Trey. However, I simply couldn't make myself care about spending 5 hours in a car (not to mention the $40 in gas and $20 for parking) to witness the Bulldogs beat a 43-point underdog. The only draw for the game was the ceremony to officially declare Russ, the UGA fill-in mascot for the past 3 years, as the official UGA IX. I'm not really big on ceremonies, so at the last minute, we decided not go.

Our plan was instead to sit around the house with Mom and watch the Florida/Tennessee game on one tv and stream the GA/FAU game on the computer. It sounded like a good plan. Unfortunately, the football gods frowned on my passing up stadium seats for the couch, and the cable went out. Since we have a cable modem, we couldn't watch football on television or the web. What a disappointment.

I don't think I'd do anything differently in repeat circumstances. Georgia went on to win 56 to 20 without my participation, I still have those 60 dollars in my bank account, and I'll definitely be back in Sanford Stadium next week when an actual SEC team finally comes to town. Maybe there is a lesson to be learned in this experience, but I guess like any good bulldog, I'm too stubborn to learn it.

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I mentioned last year that DC Comics relaunched their entire line of comics and in the process re-introduced Batman as the kind of fellow who liked to shoot guns grappling hooks through the bodies of fleeing suspects. Skip ahead one year and things aren't any better, but at least DC has stopped pretending that this Dark Knight is the same as the one I grew up with.

In this month's Batman #0, Batman's origin is retold for the forty-five millionth time. More importantly, Batman's first appearance is now listed as "Justice League #1 (2011)" rather than the traditional (and legally more accurate) Detective Comics #27 (1938). I'm sure that if either Bob Kane or Bill Finger were still alive, they'd have something to say about this.

This means that this Batman didn't exist before I was 35 years old. Whew. Now I can hate this newfangled Batman worrying whether my own cynicism had turned on me, corrupting my hobbies into hate-bies. My Batman is still good. It's just this New Batman that's so damn wrong.

Could this steroid-chewing, anger-spewing modern Batman beat my Batman? Yeah, probably. New Batman -- and I am going to insist from here on out on calling this dark perversion of my hero "New Batman," using the same derogatory tone of voice I use when I speak of "New Coke" -- New Batman is an asshole without rules, ethics, or personality. He's not a clever detective so much as he's a dialogue-laden deus ex machina plot device. Worst of all, he's simply no fun anymore.

Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I still prefer a little comic in my books. So you can keep your New Batman of 2011, DC. My Batman of 1938 and I have better things to do.

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The Miami Dolphins kicked off their 2012 season today in an opener against the Houston Texans. I know that you have read my constant rants against the Dolphins and how bad they are going to be for weeks months years, so I'll let Gregg Rosenthal of NFL.com do the talking here:

This game was actually close until the Dolphins offense imploded in the second quarter. They turned the ball over four times in four possessions including three Tannehill interceptions. At one point, they turned it over on three straight plays. It's going to be one of those kind of years.

Tannehill, it seems, never got the memo that he shouldn't throw the ball at people who aren't wearing Dolphins jerseys. The rookie looked worse than a typical rookie, throwing multiple passes at Texans linemen who tipped them in the air, turning our passing offense into the football equivalent of a basketball's jump ball.

The team surrendered 21 points in 1 minute and 53 seconds, a feat I wouldn't have thought possible if I hadn't seen it myself. When a reporter asked our brand new Head Coach what could stop the Dolphins' unprecedented string of turnovers, Joe Philbin replied, "halftime." If Joe Philbin is channeling John McKay, does that make the 2012 Dolphins the 1976 Buccaneers?

Here are a few more John McKay quotes that Philbin may want to borrow for some of the upcoming 15 remaining games in 2012:

• "We didn't tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking."
• "We stunk. We blocked bad; we were terrible on defense and our kicking game made up for it by being absolutely horrible. I saw nothing that delighted me. We ran on the field fairly well."
• On coaching: "You do a lot of praying, but most of the time the answer is 'no.'"
• On experience: "If you have everyone back from a team that lost ten games, experience isn't too important."
• On his post-season chances: "Three or four plane crashes and we're in the playoffs."
• On his team's execution: "I'm all in favor of it."

Memorize these, coach. It's going to be a long season, and I'm going to need something to distract me from your team's performance.

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From a blog post at DC Comics.com:

On August 25th, the full line of DC Comics dog products by Fetch...for pets! and Warner Bros. Consumer Products will be flying into Petco specialty stores nationwide. If you're looking for super hero toys or apparel for your dog, there's sure to be something in the collection that pleases all DC fans in your household...both human and canine!

I don't want to be the pooper at this party, but how large could the market "looking for super hero toys or apparel for your dog" be? Do I want my dogs to wear Superman's red underwear or Wonder Woman's bustier? I'm sure that my dogs don't want to wear that. Even DC's model doesn't look too happy about this situation:

Keep your chin up, buddy. At least they don't have you dressed like Catwoman. Oh, the humanity.

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