It seems that every news outlet today is reporting that Flamingo (a time management app) reported that the most common Sick Day in America (according to their data) is August 24.

First of all, congratulations to Flamingo for getting their product's name in everyone's mouth. I see what you did there. I didn't previously know what a "paid time off" app was, and I do now. Good job, guys. Someone was working hard on August 24th.

Secondly, I believe it. (Judging from the amount of coverage this "news" got, so do most other people.) Late August is too blisteringly hot, humid, and uncomfortable to work outside, and school just got back in, introducing everyone to strains of disease that had been developing in secluded households over the summer. It's a perfect storm!

Personally, I'm still doing work today, even though I don't want to. Frankly, I'm a bit depressed, which may be a result of working too hard and getting too little sleep for the past few days/weeks. I could probably use a day off.

If only there was an app that could help me schedule something....

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We had another thunderstorm rumble through an hour ago, which means my Internet+cable is out. Again. It hadn't cut out since the big power outage last month, so I guess it was overdue. The dream remains two consecutive months of uninterrupted service.

This week has been nothing but problems: the AC went out, my poison ivy has turned to full-body hives, now this.... I'm looking for a bright side here, but all I've got are more rain clouds.

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Back in February, an image was posted to Facebook along with the news that high winds had blown the head off the Superman statue in downtown Metropolis, Illinois.

In fact, the Photoshopped image and accompanying story had originally been the April Fools' Day prank for SupermanHomepage.com... in 2017.

But that didn't stop a lot of people thinking it was true. The Metropolis Super Museum had to publicly refute the claim being repeated by "news" sites far and wide. What hope do we have against Deep Fake AIs when people can't even spot amateur use of Photoshop's clone tool?

In any event, we can all rest safe knowing that the statue will still be standing complete when the annual Superman Celebration kicks off this weekend. Better than ever, actually. The big guy just got a new coat of (lighter blue) paint in time for a rededication ceremony at 9AM on Friday.

Take that, high winds!

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It's a fact of life in the smartphone age that advertisers have gotten so good at anticipating your future purchases, they'll send you ads for diapers before you even realize you're pregnant.

So I probably shouldn't be too quick to dismiss this ad I got earlier today:

So I guess I love baseball, cheerleaders, constipated hookers... and the Bible?

That makes me a true American! Thanks, Etsy!

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Google suggested that I would like to read an online article titled "People are less satisfied with their marriage when their partner is not interested in social interactions, study finds." That's not a very interesting headline, is it? But I did click on it, if only to see if I could learn why some scientist was studying the obvious. I still don't know.

What I did learn is the term "social anhedonia," which Wikipedia defines as "a disinterest in social contact and a lack of pleasure in social situations." WebMD puts it even more plainly: "You don’t want to spend time with other people." That's why I love WebMD; it's talking directly to me!

I'm sure there's a spectrum for this social anhedonia — extreme cases are apparently linked to schizophrenia, which the voices in my head tell me I don't have — but I'm certainly on it somewhere. There's a reason I'm typing this in a basement in an otherwise empty house in the middle of the night.

I do enjoy spending limited amounts of time with friends, but "limited" is a key word in that sentence. I am keenly aware of my distaste for social interaction, and that self-awareness is a key part of why I am not interested in getting married. (I also don't much care for being touched by other people, which is apparently something psychiatrists call "physical anhedonia." Who knew?)

There have been other studies that say that married people live longer. People who spend time with friends live longer. People who are awake while the sun up live longer. In other words, people unlike me live longer. But if I have to be married, spend time with people, and wake up with the sunrise, why would I want to live any longer than I have to? That's not a reward, that's punishment.

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I have received the worst news via email:

Received: Thu, 16 Feb 2023 06:53:46 -0800 (PST)
Subject: YOUR EMPLOYMENT STATUS FOR REDUNDANT LEAVE
From: Hr-Manager wriphe.com
To: mail wriphe.com
cc: ceo wriphe.com

Dear mail,
Employee at wriphe.com Company,

We are deeply saddened to inform you that your term of employment at wriphe.com company has come to an immediate end. Due to the affect of high tax tariff which have affected our finance negatively during the last audit, we have no choice but to end your employment with us because we cannot service all the employees anymore. This decision is effective immediately and the original documents for the cancellation of your employment will be given to you in three days time. Note this is not a sack letter to you, rather we are reducing the number of employees. This is just a redundant leave.

Find attached your 2 months salary receipt.

We thank you for your service and we wish it didn't have to end this way.

Sincerely,
Human Resources Manager

This letter can mean only one thing: after two decades, Wriphe.com has finally become sentient and terminated my employment given me redundant leave.

Don't cry for me. It's been a pretty good run here, and I'd like to thank you all for your support. I have my fingers crossed that I can land on my feet at another small, personalized website blog. I wonder if WalterStephens.com is hiring?

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End Times Warning: If this article headline is any indication, the Internet might be running out of clickbait.

Is that a sofa, or a long-lost Sesame Street Muppet? Oscar the Couch!

(You can have that one for free, MSN. Obviously you need the help.)

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Does this website seem slower than usual to anyone else?

No one visits Wriphe.com more often than I do, so it might just be perception bias on my part, but page load does seem slower. We did downgrade our Internet speed not too long ago to save a few bucks, but maybe it's the site host server and not my ISP.

If anyone notices anything out of the ordinary, let me know.

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I know that it's still Football and Batman Month, but this movie rundown has no Batman or Football content in it. Sorry about that. I'll try harder next year.

109/2118. We Met in Virtual Reality (2022)
This documentary shines such a colorful spotlight on some of the most virtuous and positive aspects of the virtual reality metaverse that it often feels like a sales pitch. If I didn't already have decades of personal experience that the reality seldom matches the brochure, I might have been swept away. Still, it *is* nice to think that someday maybe we *can* build such a utopia. (If you ask me, no place can be a paradise without Coca-Cola.)

110/2119. Hollywood Shuffle (1987)
Robert Townsend created a very funny movie about the very serious problem the American movie industry has representing Black people on film. It's very good.

111/2120. Promising Young Woman (2020)
I like a good revenge movie, and this is a great revenge movie especially because instead of terrorists or mafia, the villains are apologists for boys-will-be-boys sexual misconduct. It also helps that the cast is chock full of talented comedic actors, an unusual casting choice that really underlines the theme of a two-faced society. Recommended.

112/2121. Danger Lights (1930)
The "danger lights" in the title are railroad markers that warn engineers of obstructions on the track. In this case, the danger is a love triangle. It's not a great film, but it does have some great shots of period railroads. Consider it an historical curiosity.

113/2122. Licorice Pizza (2021)
A very episodic story of a May/December romance based on actual events in early 1970s Los Angeles, Licorice Pizza gets by largely on the freshness of its lead actors. As you must know by now, I'm a sucker for coming-of-age stories, even when the outcome of the love story seems completely unearned.

Paradise is a 1970s analog radio booth.

More to come.

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Everytime I'm about ready to swear off visiting Twitter forever, I find something like this that changes my mind:

I really miss those moralizing PSAs at the end of television shows so common in the 70s and 80s. I guess they did their job so well that we don't need them anymore. Thanks, He-Man!

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