30/2462. Alma's Rainbow (1994)
Another '90s black indie coming-of-age movie that aired on TCM, and also quite enjoyable, assuming you like '90s indies and/or coming-of-age movies, as I do. The pacing felt a little uneven, but that's adolescence, isn't it? I found it charming.

31/2463. Scarecrow (1973)
I've said it before, but it bears repeating after his recent, tragic death: When I was a kid, I didn't like watching Gene Hackman in a movie, but as I've aged, he's become a favorite. And it was in his memory that I watched this, which had been languishing on my DVR largely because I expected bad things from his co-star, Al Pacino (who I disliked as a kid and still dislike). In many ways, it's a dark, dark buddy road "comedy" movie based on Of Mice and Men with extra homosexual rape and mental breakdowns! The version I watched seemed to be edited in such a way as to only suggest the rape, but I read online several reviews that agree that the scene was more explicit in its first-run release. I don't know if that's true or another example of the Mandela Effect.

Coke by the barrel? Yes, please!

32/2464. The World, the Flesh and the Devil (1959)
A post-apocalyptic movie in which the only survivors are hung up on the fact that white and black people shouldn't kiss. Maybe this was as progressive as Red Scare 1959 Hollywood could get, but golly, I spent the movie very irritated that race was even as issue in the empty ruins of New York City. Maybe that was the point, but it's a frustrating viewing experience.

33/2465. The Domino Principle (1977)
More Gene Hackman! This time he's a imprisoned murderer recruited by The Government to carry out a clandestine execution. His wife (who he killed for) is played by Candice Bergman, dressed down in a bad wig to look just awful even by mid-70s style standards, and his best friend, Mickey Rooney, is given a plot twist that makes less than no sense. I didn't hate it, but really, only because of Hackman's skill at portraying a grumpy everyman scrambling to get out of proverbial quicksand.

More to come.

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25/2457. The Search (1948)
Montgomery Clift turns in a great, naturalistic performance here in his first starring role as a young American G.I. trying to help a war orphan in the ruins of Berlin. It's a very good movie. In fact, by focusing attention on the orphans and their broken world (similar to but less humorous than 2019's Jojo Rabbit), it manages the rare feat of being anti-war without glorifying the violence.

It seems unlikely Coke gave this production any money, but If the filmmakers really wanted to hide the product, they could have used a bigger towel.

26/2458. The Hollywood Revue of 1929 (1929)
Most of the entertainment value of this comes from watching motion picture studios entering the talkie era figuring out how to create the musical genre in real time. It fails as a whole, but it does have its moments. (Buster Keaton's crossdressing mermaid dance, sadly, is not one of them.) Jack Benny is the highlight as one of two Masters of Ceremonies.

27/2459. Flow (2024)
Yeah, Oscar got this one right. It's captivating. Definitely watch it with your pets: even Henry enjoyed watching it. (More accurately, I think he enjoyed listening to it. The soundtrack is all recordings of real animals.)

28/2460. Forbidden (1932)
This early Frank Capra is pure dreck melodrama without any of the audience-pleasing uplifting treacle that would become the director's trademark. I've often pooh-poohed Capra, but this could easily be my least favorite Capra film. (No, I did not know it was Capra when it came on, or I might have just turned the TV off.)

29/2461. Naked Acts (1996)
Watched on TCM in February before our Glorious Leader outlawed Black History, this is a mid-90s indie about an aspiring actress (imagined as the child of a Pam Grier type) who has body issues and a lot of baggage as she confronts the expectations of a male-dominated film industry. The budget is low and the talent is clearly raw, but the script is good and the finished product very watchable.

More to come.

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In hindsight, do I watch a lot of movies about death?

39/2048. Death on the Nile (2022)
There's a lot in this that sequel to The Orient Express that will feel not quite right to hardcore Christie fans, but I was more bothered by the CGI used to replicate 1930s Cairo than the anachronistic cultural mores or addition of Poirot's backstory. Don't get me wrong, I still liked it and would definitely keep watching Kenneth Branagh Poirot movies.

40/2049. The End (1978)
In this blackest of comedies, Burt Reynolds plays a man so afraid of pain that he is determined to kill himself before his terminal disease can. When this film works, it's usually because of Burt's natural charm, though it does squeeze some good comedy bits from very real human situations. (I found the third act slapstick to be too broad given the dark matter that preceded it. Your mileage — and tolerance of Dom DeLuise's over-the-top antics — may vary.)

Drink Coke and die!

41/2050. The Green Knight (2021)
The classic legend is about a knight on a quest to have his head chopped off, but this modern telling is more acid trip than road trip. Every line of dialog only makes the story more confusing. It might be more tolerable if it wasn't all filmed in a dark forest without lighting. Blech.

42/2051. The New Mutants (2020)
Whenever someone wonders what "studio interference" is, point them to this movie. The writer and director were very clearly using trying to make a horror film about adolescence and sexual awakening, but the studio wanted more traditional superhero fare. The actors seem completely confused (disinterested?) about what they're supposed to be doing, and the result *is* a nightmare, just not one that anyone would want to see.

43/2052. Tony Hawk: Until the Wheels Fall Off (2022)
The old footage and glowing interviews about Hawk's early days are cool. Unfortunately, Hawk is unable or unwilling to examine his adult life outside of the world of skating, so in the end, he seems almost a victim rather than a champion, especially as the story ends wallowing on his inevitable physical decline. Was the intention of this documentary to make him a martyr?

44/2053. Closed for Storm (2020)
Another documentary, this time about the doomed New Orleans Jazzland theme park, from its conception to its destruction by Katrina to its abandonment by Six Flags to New Orleans' continued inability to do anything with it's remains. Honestly, it's the last part that I found most interesting because that was when the film veered from mere morbid nostalgia to something bordering on political activism against corrupt governance. Rage against the dying of the light, indeed. Of course I liked it.

More to come.

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Somehow I didn't finish March movies in April, so let's correct that oversight. March movies watched part 3 of 3:

36. (1895.) The Show of Shows (1929)
No, really, they don't make them like this any more. This is what they call a revue, essentially a series of vaudeville-type skits and musical numbers with no structural narrative adapted from Broadway productions like the Ziegfeld Follies. This one promotes Warner Bros' sterling roster—including an early color appearance by a singing, dancing Myrna Loy!

37. (1896.) Blood on the Moon (1948)
This is a nice, taut Western story of how greed and corruption ruins lives. The highlight is the quickly souring relationship between Robert Preston and Robert Mitchum, both playing to their strengths.

38. (1897.) The Host (2013)
This movie wants to be Twilight so badly that it's sometimes painful to watch. (I didn't realize until after watching that it was based on a book by Stephenie Meyer, the author of Twilight. So I really don't know if the film's failures are the fault of the director or source material, though I suspect mostly the latter.) I watched it only because I like Saoirse Ronan, who turns in a typically game performance working with very thin material.

39. (1898.) The Killer That Stalked New York (1950)
Part police procedural, part medical drama, part film noir. The story concerns a jewel thief who unwittingly starts a smallpox pandemic in New York City. I enjoyed it very much.

40. (1899.) Inside Daisy Clover (1965)
I did not enjoy this much, but I knew I wouldn't because I don't like Natalie Wood, the titular, shallow Daisy Clover. The movie is ostensibly about how Hollywood squeezes its stars until they are pulped and discarded, but Wood's needlessly surly attitude made me feel she was, to a large degree, getting what she deserved. There's not a moment of joy in the entire film. (If you hate Hollywood so much, why did you make a Hollywood movie about it, Natalie?) The only redeeming value in the film is its deification of Myrna Loy. Damn straight, people.

More to come.

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3. The story of Mr. Tom Spy

Mr. Tom Spy was dedicated to his craft: he peeped on everyone everywhere. Blindly wandering wherever the peeping opportunity took him, he shadowed a Rogue out of the City and followed a Magus into the Woods. That proved to be his undoing.

Although Mr. Spy was good at looking at things such as tombstones in The Graveyard, he was terribly unprepared when things looked back. A Living Doll chased Mr. Spy all the way back to the City, where Tom conned an Alchemist into buying "his" doll for one gold piece.

Mr. Spy returned to the Woods only to discover that the Magus had left. Night fell suddenly and the Woods soon filled with horrible creatures like the Crypt Keeper. In no time at all, Mr. Spy was attacked by a Wolfen and infected with the dread disease of Lycanthropy.

Rushing back to the City unaware that he was being followed, Mr. Spy hoped to use his gold piece to buy a cure. However, Fate was not to be so kind. While Mr. Spy was distracted by a City Rat, a menacing Werewolf fell upon him and killed him. The End.

3 (cont'd). The story of Lady Valkyrie

The Valkyrie began her quest to purge the world of evil in the Ruins. Knowing that money was the root of all evil, she headed to the City, where she killed the City Rat and convinced the City Patrol to clean up the streets.

The good Lady Valkyrie next headed to the Graveyard, where she prayed and had her Life restored. She next ventured to and drank from the Fountain of Wisdom, improving her Craft.

Emboldened, she headed into the Crags, where she befriended a Beastmaster and a Magpie and a found a Magic Mace and Horns of Power (as well as a useless Lodestone). The mysterious even Ymir's Glow empowered her with spells! Defeating a Wind Rider, she proceeded to defeat the Lord of the Eyrie and take his precious Rage Talon. The End.

...

Talisman, game three. (Games 1 and 2 here.) I've decided that I enjoy writing these little character vignettes more than I enjoy playing Talisman.

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Hollywood has made its latest great mistake in casting Jaden Smith, Will Smith's son, in the upcoming The Karate Kid remake. Nothing against Jaden, but that role was custom made for The Douche, aka Shia LaBeouf.

Think about it: what do you remember about Ralph Macchio's Daniel Larusso? He's really whiny and runs his mouth. A lot. It gets him in fights. It ruins his relationships with family and friends. The hot girlfriends just seem to fall into his lap. Remind you of anyone else?

The Karate Kid and its sequels are really successful thanks to the work of Pat Moriata, Martin Kove, Billy Zabka and an otherwise outstanding cast. Larusso is so irritating, you're practically pulling for Johnny to destroy him when he sweeps the leg just to shut Daniel up. Likewise, LaBeouf has been in major blockbusters that have succeeded despite his douchey presence: he's been upstaged on film by an old man, computer generated stereotypes, and holes in the ground. This time around, he could have been upstaged by Jackie Chan, who knows way more kung fu than Pat Morita ever did.

You missed your chance, Hollywood. By the time you get around to remaking this film, LaBeouf will be too old to play the role. LaBeouf is already filming the sequel to Wall Street, and you've seen what happened to Charlie Sheen's face since that film. Working with Michael Douglas ages you: just ask Kathleen Turner and Sharon Stone.

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The Georgia Congress is preparing to pass a bill making texting via cell phone while driving a car illegal. This new law is being named for the child whose death while texting & driving inspired his parents to lobby Congress for the change. It will be called the "My Child Did Something So Stupid It Is Now Illegal" law. The original name for the law, the "Someone Always Ruins It For Everyone Else" law, was apparently voted down in committee. Meanwhile, running with scissors remains unregulated by state law.

In the same legislative session, the Georgia Congress has finally passed a bill requiring all pickup truck operators to wear seatbelts, closing a previously existing loophole. Georgia farmers fought the law, citing the hassle of buckling and unbuckling during frequent trips around their property and livestock. The lesson to take from this bit of news is not that Georgia farmers are too poor to pay the state-mandated $15 fine for an unbuckled seatbelt but rather that they are paranoid about the police making surprise visits to their farms to check whether they've fastened their seatbelts. Just what sort of crops are those Georgia farmers growing?

In the wake of all this legislation, the Georgia Department of Economic Development will probably need to start a new tourism campaign. Certainly they will want to consider dropping their mobile website: it'll soon be illegal to look at it while driving, but that won't matter as no one will be able to legally unbuckle his seatbelt within the state even if he wanted to.

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In the original Marvel Comics' Tales to Astonish stories featuring Ant-Man, bio-chemist Henry "Hank" Pym discovers a way to shrink himself to the size of an ant. In an attempt to keep real ants from killing him, Pym next invents a helmet that allows him to communicate telepathically with ants. What does he do with these two amazing bits of technology? He becomes a superhero, of course! Pym knows that shrinking to the size of an insect is a technology "far too dangerous to ever be used by a human again," so he keeps it to himself and immediately launches a crusade against Soviet spies.

I'd never really realized it before, but most of the signature characters of the Marvel Age were all grounded in the Cold War struggle against the U.S.S.R. The Fantastic Four had to beat the Soviets into space. A Soviet spy triggered the bomb test that birthed the Hulk. Iron Man was a casualty of the escalating "limited conflict" in southeast Asia that would become the Vietnam War. Spider-Man and Thor are notable exceptions: their careers triggered respectively by an accidental spider-bite and an alien invasion -- another common Marvel adventure even to this day. (In hindsight, it's probably not much of a coincidence that I lost interest in Marvel Comics about the time the Soviet Union collapsed.) For Pym, the battle against the Reds was personal: they killed his wife, an Hungarian freedom fighter. Sure, she'd given up fighting for freedom when well-to-do American biochemist Hank Pym came along, but she was really serious about it in college.

However, don't expect to see any of this lunacy in the long-rumored Ant-Man movie. If the thing is even made, they'll no doubt ignore the fact that Pym changes his superhero moniker from Ant-Man to Giant-Man mid-conversation if he changes his size. (Freud would have a field day with that.) Or the fact that he grafted biological wings and antenna into his female partner, the Wasp, but neglected to give her the ability to change her size without the aid of his size-changing gas or pills. (Pym kept for himself the cybernetic helmet that allowed him to change size at will. Dick.) Not to mention the fact that when Pym is ant-sized, he inexplicably maintains his full-size strength while growing stronger when he gets larger-than-life size. Or that his rogues' gallery consists primarily of such forgettable nutcases as Egghead, Human Top, Magician, Porcupine, or the scientist Garrett, who mixes eagle blood with horse blood to create a flying horse in order to exact revenge on Giant-Man. (They market these books to children and they wonder why Americans lag behind in science.)

No, they'll put Ant-Man in a black costume and pit him against the evil robot Ultron. Because mark my words, nothing ruins a computer like a bug. (Don't blame the messenger: it's just how Hollywood thinks.)

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Have I mentioned that I'm addicted to Google Earth? Well, I am. And I've learned that visible shipwrecks are much more common than I would have thought.

My favorite place to stare at from space is Prypiat, Ukraine, the city evacuated following the Chernobyl meltdown in 1986. (It's really the ultimate in modern urban ruins.) But a close second favorite attraction is aircraft museums and airports. Don't ask me why, but there's something amazing to me about seeing so many large, gravity defying crafts grounded.

And there's always the odd bonus scene, such as this 85ft Bat-Symbol at Six Flag America in Washington DC.

I'm still looking for signs of the giant Optimus Prime in Kunming, China, but for a six-story statue, he's been surprisingly elusive. Maybe it is possible for a tractor-trailer sized talking robot to hide amongst humanity.

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I think there's something to the Art Deco style that goes a little deeper than is generally credited. Years after the movement unofficially ended, it is still the subject of much emotional appeal, if it's continuing appearances in all forms of popular media are any indication. Perhaps it's because the movement is so strongly linked to the period between the World Wars of the 20th century, that period of simultaneous excess and poverty coupled with industry and futurism evocotive of the emergence of the United States as THE world power. Maybe it's because Deco was more decorative (for art's sake!) than the rival, utilitarian International Style without being as pretentious as the preceeding Nouveau. Or then again, maybe it's the fact that Deco was the springboard for the endearing Googie, providing it a position as a favored ancestor. I like to think that it's just because it looks so good.

Where did this train of thought come from, you ask? I've spent a lot of time this week looking at architecture from the American World's Fairs of the 20th century. There have been some spectacular buildings constructed for the purpose of temporary entertainment. New York has no doubt had the best of it, as the style and enduring memory of 1939's Trylon and Perisphere or 1964's Unisphere tower over other Fair relics such as Knoxville's Sunsphere, San Antonio's Tower of the Americas, and Seattle's Space Needle. (Towers and spheres were clearly pretty common themes for 20th-century modernist architects.)

I have long cherished the 1939 Fair as the cradle of superheroes. (1940 World's Fair Comics was the first to feature both Batman and Superman together -- on the cover. They were in separate stories inside.) But the 1964 Fair has a lot going for it, too. The aforementioned Unisphere is a masterpiece of sculpture. And the Uniroyal Tire Ferris Wheel was so spectacular that Detroit can't bear to let it go. (The giant vulcanized tire puts me in mind of Birmingham's cherished giant Vulcan, similarly made for a World's Fair -- St. Louis 1904 -- but now residing in a comfortable, customized park.) This all, of course, leads to one of my enduring interests: decaying urbanscapes. Have you seen the remains of 1964's New York State Pavilion? Fantastic!

To quote the NY Pavilion architect, Philip Johnson, "There ought to be a university course in the pleasure of ruins."

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