Showing 1 - 3 of 3 posts found matching keyword: flattop

As I type this, the United States has 1.188 million confirmed cases of COVID-19 and 68,276 deaths. More Americans have already died in the past 2 months from COVID-19 than died in the entire Vietnam War. And it's not over yet. By the time you read this, those numbers will be worse.

A quick computation of those figures reveals a current mortality rate of nearly 6%. If you've been paying attention (what else have you got to do?), you may remember that back at the beginning of March, the World Health Organization was estimating a 3.4% mortality rate — an estimate our wise president chose to call "a false number" in a live television interview with Sean Hannity on Fox News. He objected to the WHO number not because it was too low, but because it was much, much to high. "I would say the number is way under one percent," said the president.

(Footnote for future historians: That comment was made on March 4. A month later, April 14, Trump withdrew funding to the WHO claiming that they failed to report the true danger of the virus back in January. Quote: "The reality is that the WHO failed to adequately obtain that and share information in a timely and transparent fashion." By that logic, I guess we should stop funding the current American president, too.)

Testing continues to be a problem, so we can't really be sure that the 1,188,122 number I referenced above is the true extent of the contamination. If we assume that the actual mortality rate is closer to 3.4% previously observed in other countries, it would mean that over 2 million Americans currently have or have had the disease. That's over a million hidden, untreated, pandemic-spreading cases. Sure seems like someone should be thinking twice about opening those shopping malls, Governor Kemp.

Also unreported in all those grim details is another victim of COVID-19. Specifically, I'm talking about my flattop.


I haven't seen a barber in over a decade, but in an act of solidarity with coronavirus-positive Tom Hanks (and maybe a little laziness), I decided to go ahead and trim my hair down to the scalp. Does it make me look more bald or less?

These days, the fact that I'm alive and well enough to worry about such things feels like an accomplishment.

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Real men wear flattops.

If you're reading this blog, you probably know that my hairstyle of choice is the high and tight flattop. I've been sporting a flattop of one color or another for well over a decade. The style is commonly associated with politically conservative men of action, which of course I am: "program," "sleep," and "complain" are all action verbs. The style has many benefits: it gets ready before I do in the morning, makes it easy to see if I'm tall enough to ride roller coasters, and ensures that I never get "hat hair," only "hat forehead." I can't imagine wearing any other hairstyle, especially now that my hairline has ordered a steady and orderly retreat up my forehead. I may be losing the battle with Father Time, but at least I've still got style.

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Late for my haircut, (gotta keep the flattop flat, you know), but I took the time to post the new charactersheet to the dnd page. We'll see how it works this weekend.

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To be continued...


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