The only downside to watching over two hundred hours of Olympic coverage in recent weeks is the constant bombardment of advertisements for the latest entry in the Georgia governor race, Rick Jackson. Apparently, he's a billionaire, and I only know that because A) he brags about it in his ads, and B) he bought ads in seemingly every possible commercial break. From someone who likes to remind us that he's a self-made billionaire, that doesn't seem like a very effective use of money.

The story of his by-his-bootstraps, up-from-foster-care wealth isn't the only thing I've learned from his commercials. He's also really into cutting taxes. A billionaire who doesn't want to pay taxes? How novel. I wonder if neither of us pays, which one comes out ahead?

To be fair, it seems everyone in the race wants to cut my taxes. Getting rid of income tax is a hot topic in Georgia politics right now. I say "right now," but it's a fact of life that no one ever wants to pay taxes. And, as an added bonus, if the state government doesn't have any money, then they don't have to worry that some of that money might be spent on people who "want to sit on your butt, binge watch Netflix, and scarf down Cheetos," to quote the Rick Jackson on my television. What kind of worthless scum likes watching movies and eating delicious snacks? Fuck those losers!

It would be disingenuous to call Rick Jackson an outsider in Georgia politics. He has long been a prominent (and deep-pocketed) donor to state and national Republicans. His late entry into this election indicates he doesn't think he's getting his money's worth from the current candidates. Though I'm no fan of his recent vow to become "Trump's favorite governor," I have read enough about Jackson to suspect he's probably a better human being than his vainglorious attempt to buy an election would indicate. It's nice to think that there are very fine people on both sides.

Therefore, I assume Jackson would be pleased to hear that many, many, many repeated viewings of his life story have already left an impact on my life. I'm so sick of his commercials that I have nicknamed the mute button on my remote the "Rick Jackson button."

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I don't know what in specific I thought I was saving this for, so I'll just put this here:

*This is an actual quote. Though I have started repeating it in sad desperation at what now passes itself off as American government, Colbert said it largely in jest at the end of his "Meanwhile" rant on August 14, 2024, in response to a July 25, 2024, article in the Associated Press about the Ohio Supreme Court's 4-3 decision that deboned chicken wings advertised as "boneless" may still contain bones. Per the report, the majority ruled that "boneless" was a style of preparation not a guarantee, and consumers should have the common sense to consume them with due caution without dining establishments fearing lawsuits from choking victims. I tend to agree with the court here, but I can see the point of the three dissenting justices that Americans are probably much, much dumber than the court gives them credit for.

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From October 2013 through August 2017, back when Comedy Central actually aired new content, the Colbert Report (hallowed be its name) was followed by @midnight. Now that Colbert has recorded more Late Show episodes than Colbert Report episodes, he has brought @midnight to CBS with twice the running time, re-branded as @fter midnight.

I am already on record as a fan of @midnight, and I am excited it is returning. But I have 2 problems:

1. it airs opposite my favorite late-night talk show, Late Night with Seth Meyers; and
2. its one-hour length is too much of a good thing.

I can solve for (1) by use of my DVR to watch it at a more convenient time. (Sorry, CBS, but Seth comes first.) Problem (2) is a bigger issue.

The original @midnight was a thirty-minute show, which allowed for a tighter edit with only the best jokes and a faster pace. After just a week of episodes, it seems clear that despite new host Taylor Tomlinson's quick wit, the hour-long format is going to have to include a lot of weaker material. That's going to be a problem for maintaining my interest, and if you can't keep a serial late-night watcher like me interested, you've got trouble in your timeslot.

I hope they get this fixed. I liked @midnight for the duration of its run, and I'd like to enjoy @fter midnight for at least as long.

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2020 has done it again. Alex Trebek has died from pancreatic cancer at age 80.

In the year 2014 BC (Before COVID), Trebek appeared on the final episode of The Colbert Report to reassure its departing host:

"So I guess I'll be gone forever?" Colbert asked.

"No, Stephen," answered Trebek. "We'll always be there for the American people, whenever they need us the most."

May he live forever in reruns.

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Would Trump be our president if The Colbert Report was still on the air? If you didn't watch the show, that probably sounds like a stupid question. Maybe you didn't watch The Colbert Report. It averaged only about 1 million viewers per night. Perhaps you weren't one of them. There's no shame in that. It was on late anyway.

Maybe you didn't watch because you didn't like Colbert's fawning right-wing politics and devotion to what he called "truthiness," only believing the facts that he wanted to believe, whether they were true or not. That was a put-on, a satire of what passes for television journalism in 21st century America, but it's understandable if you didn't realize it. Humor is subjective, and no one like to feel like the butt of the joke.

But Colbert wasn't canceled because you didn't watch. It was canceled because CBS offered Stephen Colbert a lot of money and he took it. Unfortunately, when he went to CBS, he didn't take his satirical character with him. Where he once had a well-earned reputation for speaking truth to power, he chose instead to glibly shill celebrity clothing lines. And that's my point.

Trump entered the presidential race only six months after The Colbert Report left the air. While plenty of voices decried Trump's nonstop stream of bullshit, the voice that would have been the most damning would have been the one most like his own. In our time of need, there was no one to lead us.

Would Trump be our president if The Colbert Report was still on the air? Probably yes. Frankly, the people who voted for Trump weren't the sort who would watch a nightly half-hour satirical comedy show about politics. But watching Trump's crony capitalists loot every American institution for their own benefit would be a lot less painful experience if Dr. Stephen T. Colbert was around to cushion the blow with his sharp tongue. Sadly, Kanye West's $120 t-shirts just don't seem that amusing anymore.

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I've been slow to accept Stephen Colbert's new gig, but either I'm softening or Stephen is getting better.

On last night's Late Show, Stephen opened with a frank discussion about how we can solve the ISIS problem before getting into a deliciously contentious debate with Bill Maher. He closed the show with an animal act billed as the "Acro Cats." The cats responded to the high-pressure of a televised performance pretty much the same way Bill Maher did: by refusing to be led or cajoled. Hilarious.

Good work, Mr. Colbert. You've got my attention.

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It feels like sacrilege to say this, but I'm not in love with Stephen Colbert's new Late Show talk show. It's been just over a month now, and it still isn't quite comfortable for me. Maybe it's uncomfortable for Stephen, too.

He starts each episode with a goofy dance like Ellen before transitioning to a largely disposable monologue like Leno. When he finally gets behind the desk, the comedy bits are generally insightful and funny, but either by design or circumstance, they've lost most of the Letterman-like sarcastic bite The Character delivered on Colbert's previous show. Even the guests don't feel right: the Fallon-style of showcasing too many celebrities and politicians with pre-established talking points leaves little leeway for Stephen's improv skills.

To sum up my problem in a nutshell: Stephen and his crew look to be trying too hard to fit themselves into the "late night talk show" format instead of the other way around. So far, it seems like a waste of Colbert's talents.

I'm hoping they'll settle in to something better. My current favorite late night host is Seth Meyers, and it has taken him well over a year to sand off the rough edges of his show. When he started, Meyers was one part Conan O'Brien and one part Wendy Williams. It's gotten better now that Seth no longer feels compelled to deliver a Carson-style monologue or tell me so much about his personal life.

I'm not giving up on Colbert or his show yet. I'm disappointed, not devastated. Stephen is a man of amazing talent. I hope he finds a way to showcase it.

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This is the last week of shows for David Letterman. For the next few days, we'll be bombarded by a stream of pro-Letterman hype and hyperbole in a desperate attempt to remind us that he was once relevant. Personally, I stopped caring about Letterman a long time ago, and I find this "retirement" nonsense long overdue.

Some say Dave's luster dimmed when he left NBC for CBS in 1993, but he still managed to be entertaining for a few years. I didn't lose respect for the man until about 2000. After a prolonged period of making biting, derogatory insults about Senate hopeful Hillary Clinton's reluctance to come on his program, he disappointingly turned into a lap dog when she finally arrived. Gone was sarcastic and clever Dave, replaced by some milquetoast who did nothing but make polite small talk and laugh at her jokes. If Dave wouldn't or couldn't follow up his bluster, he should have refused the interview rather than waste his audience's time shilling for another politician.

This transformation from comedic outsider to corporate tool roughly coincided with Letterman's heart bypass surgery. No one will argue that after Dave came back to television, he was but a shadow of his former self. It's startling to think that he's passed the intervening 14 years living on a reputation for irreverence earned in the 80s. Seeing him finally leave CBS is almost a relief.

Not that I wish Letterman any ill will. I just look forward to the arrival of his replacement. I've felt unmoored since Stephen Colbert left Comedy Central back in December. For nearly a decade, Colbert's show was righteously satirical consistently hysterical. I have my doubts that anything will soon take it's place, and I don't think that Colbert will even try on CBS. I don't look forward to seeing another talk show in the threadbare late-night mold, but if there's anyone I'm going to watch do it, it's Colbert.

So get out of the way, Letterman. Make some room for someone who still wants the job.

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I've watched The Colbert Report almost every day since it debuted in 2005. I think it routinely features some of the most pointed social and political commentary on television. I routinely schedule my nights around watching it at 11:30 PM Monday through Thursday. Starting in 2015, it looks like I'll be able to go to bed a little earlier.

By now the world knows that Stephen Colbert has been tapped to replace David Letterman on The Late Show. Stephen will not be moving The Colbert Report to CBS. Instead, the show will end, and Stephen Colbert's clueless conservative "Stephen T. Colbert" character will end with it. That's not funny.

The part of The Colbert Report that I enjoy least is the interview segment. To hear that Colbert is likely moving towards a more traditional talk show format for CBS isn't encouraging news to me. It's like hearing that Jeopardy! will be changing format and removing the answers and questions so each episode was only Alex Trebek talking to the contestants. Blech.

This move does have one small silver lining. At least now I don't have to worry about the Colbert writing staff stealing my snark anymore. The less competition, the better!

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I'm going to go on record as a huge fan of Chris Hardwick's latest venture on Comedy Central: @midnight. I've never been nuts about Chris Hardwick — the poor boy tries too hard — but he works for me as the host who thinks everything his panel says is funny.

Technically a game show, @midnight is from the old school, where the show is more important than the game. Each episode lives or dies by its panel of comedians. If the guests aren't in the right mood (i.e. David Spade's appearance), it can be a bit of a chore to get through a half hour. Fortunately, Hardwick and Exec Producer (one of many) Thomas Lennon have good connections and the chemistry between their comedian friends is usually good. When the chemistry is good, the show is hysterical.

I was already watching Stewart and Colbert during the elven o'clock hour, so I've had no problem adding @midnight to my regular schedule. I don't like changing my schedule, so here's hoping @midnight is successful for some time to come.

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