For the past 6 months, I've been using prescription fluoride toothpaste and prescription fluoride rinse. My soft drink consumption is at an all-time low. I even floss occasionally. And my dentist told me I still had a cavity when I saw him earlier this week!

I don't have a punchline for this. Just keep in mind when you read this blog in the future, that the guy who wrote it has no teeth, figuratively or otherwise.

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The Man with the Golden Gums: in the past month, I've spent $1,439 on dental work. That's the most that I've spent on anything in a one-month span since, well, ever. I'm well on my way to being the Six Million Dollar Man, with the entire amount spent entirely on my teeth.

A Chew to a Kill: For the record, those aren't my teeth. My teeth don't look that good. Those are just some x-rays dated May 5, 1951, that I found in my late grandfather's records. They aren't his teeth, either. He was a dentist. I'm sure that if he wasn't already dead, seeing the state of my teeth would kill him.

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