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True statement: in 2017, you are 4x more likely to be a victim in a mass shooting (1 in 169,000) than be struck by lightning (1 in 700,000). I'm sure the NRA will move to correct that problem by buying up the country's supply of lightning rods.

While it's tempting to say that America has a gun problem, keep in mind that there are some things out there worse than guns. Of course, I'm talking about deer.

I've mentioned before that StateFarm has calculated the average American has a 1 in 169 chance of being struck by a deer. Those odds are terrifying, and I think they go a long way to explaining why America is obsessed with guns.

Just yesterday, the New York Post ran the headline "Deer gores unarmed hunter to death". As bad as it sounds, a closer read reveals the goring took place in France. France is far more restrictive about guns than America is. If that poor hunter had lived in America, he'd probably still be alive today. (Unless he was involved in a mass shooting.)

It was reported last year that a lightning storm killed 323 reindeer in Norway. That's a lot of deer, but it isn't enough. It's been estimated that there are 30 million deer in America. At 1 in 700,000, it'll take 21 trillion bolts of lightning to get them all. Obviously, lightning's going to need some help. We're going to need all the guns we can get our hands on to win the Great Deer Uprising.

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October movies, part 2 of 3:

135. (1194.) Florence Foster Jenkins (2016)
What a lightweight movie. It's too shallow to call it a character study, making it more like an extended SNL sketch. It works best when Streep is singing; you can't help but laugh.

136. (1195.) The Paradine Case (1947)
This Hitchcock film felt like a gender-flipped variation on his earlier masterpiece Rebecca. It's good, though I'm not nuts about Gregory Peck in the lead role.

137. (1196.) Kiss of the Tarantula (1976)
A dumb, low budget horror movie about a girl who kills people with — guess what? — tarantulas. It's too dull to have a lot of entertainment value as a cult film, but if you really like the fantasy of revenge flicks and spiders, this might be for you.

138. (1197.) Pitch Perfect 2 (2015)
Setup, punchline, repeat. This sequel trades the "heart" of the original for nonstop comedy and snark. I enjoyed it. (Hey! Pentatonix is even in it!)

More to come.

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