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Sunday 16 January 2011
While the ongoing Great Deer Uprising of 2010 has been very deadly with casualties mounting on both sides, at least there is one thing that the deer still can't do: shoot us. Hopefully they also can't use the internet, as Reuters News Service has just reported:
A wounded fox shot its would-be killer in [Grodno] Belarus by pulling the trigger on the hunter's gun as the pair scuffled after the man tried to finish the animal off with the butt of the rifle. The unnamed hunter, who had approached the fox after wounding it from a distance, was in hospital with a leg wound, while the fox made its escape.
Should these European foxes ever manage to contact American deer, I fear that hunters everywhere could find themselves in the crosshairs. Orange vests will turn red with spilled blood as deer couple their newfound knowledge with America's relatively lax gun control laws.
Let us all do our parts to keep these two parties apart lest we find that our forests filled with the smell of gunpowder and spine-curdling cries of "Remember Bambi's Mom!"