Chere helps

Poodle Philosophies

Poodle Trouble

Searching for an escapegoat

Super-Poodle

Poodles read Thoreau, too.

You are what you eat.

Football, Poodle Style

Are poodles a cowardly, superstitious lot.

Poodles: they worm their way into your heart.

Poodles vs. Squirrels: round 1

Adventures in Fine Dining

Giving thanks for poodles. And turkeys.

Poodles are a cut above other breeds.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a dog night!

The sooner you make New Year's resolutions, the sooner you can break them.

Always do what they cliche.

Live at Poodle-kon!

Fortunately, babies have tiny hands.

Squirreled away for a rainy day.

I dedicate this strip to Randy Fike.

Hungry like the wolf

A tisket, a tasket, a poodle with a basket.

Fast food for poodles

Even for poodles, the grass is always greener on the other side.

Separated at birth: Al Gore and John Schneider

Does anyone who reads this blog even know who Krypto is?

See, her name is July.

The 4 Puppies of the Apocalypse

Dogs taste better with mustard.

What'cha wanna do, Rambo?

Look, it's the Poodle-sign!

Foul: Un-poodle-like Conduct!

This strip isn't really about a dead chipmunk.

Based on a true story

Victoria is a Special dog.

Thanksgiving leftovers, doggy style

She used to be such a good dog

Gift of the Poodi

Neither of my poodles is named Patience

A poodle begins in delight and ends in wisdom.

Love means never letting go.

The good, the bad, and the poodles

It's always a good time for poodles!

Technically, they obey me.

She thinks I can throw that ball really fast.

Love from afar.

Every poodle has a silver lining.

Don't tell Victoria, but 'poodle' is from the German word for puddle.

If we wanted dogs to watch more TV, we would replace every actor with a squirrel.

She has a pretty good grasp of the American Way

Too much sugar rots your canine teeth

Poodles know to always snipe from cover

Knock Knock joke, poodle style

The Poodle Always Rings around the Bathtub Twice

NFL: Naps For Life

Batman doesn't have to use his teeth.

Soap, the old-school tub toy

Victoria has her own idea of what "sit" means

The food is always tastier in the other bowl

Poodles have no belt to loosen after dinner

They shoot Christmas Specials, don't they?

Cookies left out on a table overnight + hungry poodles = trouble

For poodles the whole world is candy

Lazy days of July

Teaching a new dog old tricks

Poodles are the ruling class of dogs

Poodles are comfortable in their own skin, even when they don't know what their hair color is

It's not the size of the poodle in the fight...

Some well trained dogs

Based on a true story

Fences: prisons for dogs

They really should use a different sound effect for doorbells on television

She is what she eats

Who has time for TV when there are squirrels in the yard?

So far as dogs are concerned, snakes are sticks that throw themselves

Poodle baths require equal parts shampoo and Liquid Plumr

Yes, July gave me poison ivy

Power corrupts even poodles

One thing's for sure: he's not a poodle

No one is going to get this joke

I know from experience that you can't even see July's eyes in the dark

Based on a true story

He's a clothes poodle

To be honest, the movie I was watching was TRUE GRIT, but I didn't think as many people would recognize the quote if I wrote 'fill your hands, you son of a bitch'.

July did not find this amusing when it actually happened to her

The septic tank leaked and Victoria was the first to find it

To Victoria, chicken tastes like everything

Trouble starts with T which rhymes with P which stands for Poodle

We just reseeded the back yard. The girls are not happy about it.

Next time: choke chain

Independent girls have a tough time being alone

I've created a monster

I just discovered that I cannot spell 'veterinarian'

Classic strips, re-tooled for modern audiences

I'm beginning to think Victoria likes baths

I've created a monster

Papa Johns is making a fortune off me this holiday season

She is

The vet tech said she bucked like a horse the whole time

She still hasn't caught one

Maybe Victoria really is an apricot poodle

Based on a true story

I don't know what she's talking about. I think curling is awesome.

She's not kidding. She will take your hand off.

For the record, the balloon was blue

She's lucky she doesn't have a mohawk now

Does this ring a bell?

Every night

Its the only thing in the kitchen she can't open herself

I think she does it on purpose

I try to be fair

I'm thinking about using quick-release collars

Who can enjoy the ladies when they're spending all their time chasing goats?

What Victoria wants, Victoria gets

To Victoria, 'something nice' means pizza crust

Some sacrifices are required in the name of science

Confession: I have no idea what July's siblings' names are

Man's best friend (so long as he has a goodie)

Why does dishwashing detergent look like candy?

A shaggy dog story

She's smarter than I am

Poodles never worry about trading freedom for security

July had the good manners to act embarrassed afterwards

Can you believe that some people actually like soccer?

Jamie Foxx as Daddy Warbucks? Seriously?

I'm still a little mad

This is not at all like how Americans have responded to ebola

The chair is not a prop; it's a lifestyle

Size matters not

I told you poodles are smart

True fact: puppies never sleep

I think they only reason they nap so much is because they don't want to come when I call

Teddy doesn't bite, but maybe he should

This year Victoria resolves to nap more

She's still mad at me

I don't know how they can tell

Maybe I should paint the windows black

If only they could bake medicine into pizza crusts

Our poor neighbors

July loves to stay home from school

Funny thing is that she hates peanuts

You can't even remind old dogs about tricks they already know

The thing Victoria does best is sleep

So I bought her some new ones

Showers are especially tricky

July loves to reference pop-culture history from 10 years before she was born

I'm sure the squirrels are getting smarter

The truth hurts

She doesn't not travel well

Have you ever seen a poodle wear glasses?

Seriously? It's 5 in the morning!

Mercy is for the weak!

She spent the fourth hiding under my desk

This strip is lame

They're sleeping now, but they wake up like clockwork when it's time for goodies

No more glasses of water before bed

Victoria is a picky eater

It probably wasn't designed for queens with claws

Are you ready for some football? If so, visit your local Chrysler dealer

Cleanliness is next to goodliness

I'm ok with never being as good as Bill Finger

She lives to tease

My punchlines are old too

Halloween is just like any other day for July: treats aplenty

Christmas is just like any other day for Victoria: tricks aplenty

I think we're having ham this year

The Force is strong in this one

She never complains so long as she sees treats at the end of the tunnel

This one's for Keith

Nailed it

Another toe-rific comic

Cancer? I never even met her!

July isn't a poodle; she's a three-toed sloth

The thrill of the hunt

Dogs don't care about football

They still love me

It just gives me heartburn

Their cuteness is an impenetrable force field

Springtime = bath time

I always have to make vet appointments for two

She slept through the making of this cartoon

You know this is a joke. There is no way Victoria would sleep through a shot at pizza

I use it to buy pizza and pet medicine

Victoria hates to lose

Victoria really, really hates to lose

Victoria doubles down

Victoria doesn't win, she pwns

We miss you, Victoria

Squirrels are little bastards

She's serious about those goodies

Do you remember my first poodle strip?

All parents are hypocrites

That's Chewie's bowl

We only go potty after dark

Cotton Mather was his role model

Humans also use only 10% of our brains

Poodles are not the rabbit's natural enemy

In real life, the treats go straight in her mouth

The puppy didn't have a name yet. July suggested 'Worms'

July is surprisingly well read for a dog

By one point

This is why she acts surprised by her own farts

Technically, Dr. Allen didn't prescribe this

I wouldn't forget things if I took her with me

I wrote this before the election

She watched my aunt crawl through the kitchen window and didn't say a word

Square meals for July are literally square

She doesn't care so long as she gets a goodie in her stocking

Rain in how Mother Nature cleans her toilets

If we'd have known he was going to grow up to be such a bastard, we'd have smothered him in the crib

They also have no thumbs

I think it always comes out well

Poodle remorse

Old people are the worst

I'm sure they'll end up the best of friends

The only thing she loves more than acorns are shoelaces

Audrey™ merchandise coming soon

I should have saved this joke for Presidents Day

This is what mom gets for going to the beach

Audrey's favorite chew toy is July

At $10 per Kong, July's going to need to get a part time job soon

Cuteness is no match for poodle smarts

Obedience school is not going well

I keep telling her it's okay to bite

Potty training is apparently a college level course

I have no idea if Audrey can see anything through her bangs

Wise men know that sometimes you need a second pair of shorts

I thought I did

Those buns cost a whole 50 cents

Girls just want to have naps

Also, you can't get enough naps

But fewer trips to the pet store

The easiest comic I've ever made

Her first choice was Art History, but Mom wanted her to get something useful

Audrey isn't used to football season yet. She still jumps when Mom yells at the tv.

I'd rather be on the beach with dogs than people.

Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb!

She really does think they're someone else's toots

Actually, I don't eat at Wendy's anymore. She betrayed me by changing her recipes.

Dogs are just like people: they most love what they cannot have.

This is not what I intended when I sat down to draw it, but the spirit overcame me.

Brace yourself. This is only the beginning.

You're going to want to sit down

The Rule of Three says I should stop here

The Rule of Three can bite me

You're starting to wonder how much longer this is going to go on, aren't you?

Halfway there!

I could do this all week. Oh, wait.

My hand is staring to cramp

I hurt the ones I love

We're in the home stretch now!

Life is a journey, not a destination

She's still taking it out on me

It's true! Every snowflake is different.

Holidays are overrated

I believe the technical term for dog sweaters is 'straightjacket'

Mekhi Brown punched a UGA player and his own coach yet was back in the game to make a key tackle one series later. What can you do against that?

This is libel. They've both actually been very sweet and patient with me.

They say that a one-year-old dog is the age equivalence of a 15-year-old human. July is not going to help Audrey study for her driver's test.

She's my favorite tween

I say we start a program to trade guns for dogs

I do call these 'poodle' strips, not 'havanese' strips

I have created a monster

Don't let her fool you; Audrey hates baths too

Nothing says 'resurrection' like chocolate rabbits!

Some things do smell worse than wet dog

When she doesn't get her way, she pouts. It's real cute.

I just couldn't stop writing punchlines

You don't know how hard it was not to make a Pudding Pop joke here

July has learned to appreciate a good nap

Audrey hates being told what to do

It's a joke about jokes

No, really. The new TV is yuuge.

Flea collars and flea powders and flea shampoos ... are the fleas getting a cut of all this?

Fleas are also apparently indestructible

Sometimes I feel like I'm chasing my own tail

This comic may have been about me

This is not a joke

If we started celebrating Christmas this early, the new Black Friday would be September 21

Bad dog

I admit it. It's too short.

I think the same thing happens to insects

This explains my credit card bill

Slippery when wet

Fred Rogers would have HATED this joke

I can't believe she ate the whole thing

She chases squirrels so hard, she makes herself sick

Scarlett Snax

July can't read either

July's favorite holiday

I blame you for this, Ken

Joke blatantly stolen from friend Otto

The older poodles get, the less they care about the repercussions

Silly dogs! Everyone knows the Cheeze-It® Bowl and Famous Idaho Potato® Bowl aren't played at the same time!

But they do get shorter

The only way to win is not to play

Snow long

Make Westminster Great Again

She's gained 5 pounds

Scarlett will always be welcome at our house... so long as she makes an appointment first

I just woke up

At least she can't jump this fence

If only they could bake medicine into pizza crusts, I said

The Matrix is 20 years old. Sigh.

Any excuse for a nap

And I'm no Jim Davis

Never confuse the art with the artist. Except in this case.

The older you get, the less patient you are about the important things

Poodles are dog topiaries

She always gets what she wants

Didn't you go to obedience school with Noah's dog?

By the time you read this, she will be out of surgery

Sisters!

Poor Toto was still black in Oz

Meanwhile, dogkind had already long mastered leaping

It's a good thing phones aren't made for paws

If it smelled like food, she'd eat a brick

She told me to shove it

July has a supernatural ability to know where you are about to step

It's a joke for Greenpeace volunteers with English majors

I make my dog watch too many movies

It's how she learned to count

She gets surly if I forget

She really didn't want to go; she just hates it when I leave.

Audrey loves the Halloween baking competitions on Food Network

Audrey loves the Thanksgiving baking competitions on Food Network

There aren't enough Thanksgiving poems

It must not be possible to eat until you pop because Audrey would have burst by now

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

July is a big Steve Martin fan

Father Time comes for everyone, even dogs

Sarcastic quip

to pizza or to pizza (there is no 'not to pizza' question)

I paid her a whole pizza to pose for this. It was worth it.

The older I get, the worse my jokes are

That's why they call them standards

That's just science!

CDC says masks don't work; we're all doomed

seriously, she's loving it

Bath time!

She's really good at 'sit'

I like to think I'm a Dorothy, but I'm probably a Sophia

Stubborn isn't a strong enough term

'Bark, bark' means 'I love you'

I wanted to use a curse word here

So this is the future? I don't like it

#BlackLivesMatter, Jeffy!

You thought Uranus was the only planet with a dirty name?

U! S! A!

The zodiac sign for July is Cancer

At least it's not COVID

Hashtag CancerCulture

Well you know, we're all doing what we can

No one has a better sense of humor than theologians

She does like a good handout

We get passed by turtles

I wondered why I kept finding glitter everywhere

Duh nuh nuh nuh nuh, Batdog!

She still responds to the sound of the can opener

I try not to lose my patience. I fail.

PLEASE MAKE IT STOP

I should embed a rim shot sound effect

Gallows humor: for when you're at the end of your rope

Dogs are so much wiser than people

I tell a variation on this joke each year

Giving thanks for a full life

There's a learning curve

I will

Me, too

He always is

You better run. You better take cover.

What a Lulu!

The price of cuteness

She was very excited about the cake

Unity means you all must do what *I* say!

Could use some salt

Dogs are very territorial

A dog has got to know her limitations

Don't worry; she always cleans her pillow

Actually, she handled last week's middle-of-the-night weather event like a brave (and tired) little champ

She got her annual shot on Friday and slept all day Saturday

I always forget which is which

We couldn't tell if she was sick or just really, really relaxed

Her favorite thing is actually eating, but she can't do that 24 hours a day

Not only can she smell pizza, she can spell it

Dog Buddha is the breakout character of 2021!

This is what dog disappointment looks like

I've been waiting forever to make this joke

Ghandi may not have said it, but he didn't make comic strips, either

To be continued...

 

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