Wriphe.com: The Blog 2024

"Played any new good games lately?" asks Friend Brian as we're queueing up our 215th hour of Borderlands 3. Sadly, the answer is "no."

I spent most of the spring and summer playing the fantasy-genre tactics game Unicorn Overlord and loving it. (Considering that I spent more than 100 hours 100-percentiing that game, you won't be surprised to hear that I rate it a 10 out of 10!) Finding a worthy follow-up has been a bigger challenge than the game itself.

Part of the problem has been that I've been trying to get by without spending a lot of money. Like everyone else in America, I feel that everything is too expensive, but saying that I'm saving money because of the post-pandemic economy has put a squeeze on my income would be an exaggeration if not an outright lie. I'm really just a cheap bastard. (If I could be sure a game I bought was going to give me a hundred hours of entertainment, sure, I'd pay up. But there are only so many Unicorn Overlords and Borderlands 3s out there.)

Because I pay Xbox (current Gamerscore: 161,005) for the ability to play online with friends (proving that I have more money than brains, as very few of my friends even have an Xbox), Microsoft offers me access to some games for free. Using that program, I tried Snow Runner. It belongs to the genre calling themselves sims: virtual duplicates of real world situations with a minimum of added gamification. Imagine an application in which you manipulate only one digitally rendered straw of hay a time while you look for a single pin and you'll get the idea. Heck, that would probably be more fun than Snow Runner.

Snow Runner is a game in the same sense that pushing a single Tonka truck back and forth through a mud puddle is a game. Like any competent drug dealer, Snow Runner gives you a couple of trucks, but the rest you have to explore to find for yourself (or outright buy to unlock). By "explore," I mean "trudge very slowly into deeper and damper quicksand from which there is no escape." If you google Snow Runner, you will find many comments from players admitting they expect others will find it boring and bemoaning what it might say about them that they find enjoyment in it. All I can say for sure is that apparently there are a lot of masochists in the world.

The fifth time my truck got stuck in a ditch (forcing me to reset to my distant garage) was enough for me. I grew to hate this so much that the main reason I'm posting about video games today is so that I can tell the world how much Snow Runner sucks. I think Xbox gives it out for free to punish people looking for free games. I'm starting to get the message.

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Ethics quiz time!

Setup: I have been playing a video game online with a friend who, to protect his anonymity, we will call Ken. Ken loves the game; I do not. Ken's enthusiasm and proficiency have resulted in much greater experience gain for his character than mine, which has the practical effect of making the game easier (and more fun) for him as it simultaneously, through natural progression of the game levels, becomes more difficult and frustrating for me.

Situation: Without telling me his plan, Ken took the time to play the game solo to perform the monotonous task of gathering resources that can be used to give additional experience to a character. Ken would later say he intended to give the resources to me so that my character would be more powerful and I might enjoy the game more. Instead, he applied those resources to his own character, and as a result, what was previously an 8 level difference between our characters has become an 80 level difference, greatly exacerbating the original problem.

Question: Despite the outcome, does Ken deserve my appreciation for his "good intention" of helping me to level up in a game I do not enjoy playing, even if the practical outcome of his act was ensuring that I will never play that game with him again?

...

My Answer: No. My personal philosophy is that intentions do not matter. Therefore, I do not believe Ken deserves any reward (or thanks) for the work he may have put in trying to make the game better. However, I also think it is inappropriate (and rude) to punish someone for a legitimate mistake on their part that resulted in no actual harm.

So no hard feelings, Ken, or whatever your name is.

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In the past 24 hours, I finished the book I've been reading at night, 60 Songs That Explain the '90s (a series of semi-autobiographical essays adapted from a podcast of the same name), the book I've been reading in the bathroom, Easy Riders, Raging Bulls (a very in-depth history of the New Hollywood movement of the 1970s), and the video game I've been playing in between, Deathloop (a stealth action sim set in a repeating time singularity).

I hadn't intended that those endings should so neatly coincide; it just sort of happened. I only comment on it because it is kind of unusual. For example, in the time it has taken me to get through Easy Riders, I also finished the books Three Rocks: The Story of Earnie Bushmiller the Man Who Created Nancy, The Quality [Comics] Companion, and Surely You Can't Be Serious: The True Story of Airplane (as well as the video games Marvel's Midnight Suns, Psychonauts 2, and Portal 2).

And, of course, none of that counts the movies I've been watching and rewatching, including such classics as The Bad News Bears, Fantastic Mr. Fox, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, and The Thin Man.

What can I say? I like to stay entertained.

The big question now is what will I be reading next? I've had Dead Wake: The Last Crossing of the Lusitania on my bedside table for months now, but I think I'm going to start These Are the Voyages: TOS Season 1 instead because I always need more classic Star Trek. (Thanks, Cam!)

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Before you ask, no, I do not intend to play the new Suicide Squad: Kill the Justice League video game. I have no desire to play a villain who kills heroes like Superman, and, frankly, I'm a little disturbed that Warner Bros thinks there is enough money to be made by people who do have such a desire that they allowed such a game to be made.

I am willing to concede that there are some people the world would be better without. I recognize there is a role in human society for people who are willing to execute those people. Although I believe a strong ethical argument can be made against it and a perfect world wouldn't need it, capital punishment has its place in what passes for modern "civilization."

As a fan of crime movies and video games, I am also willing to admit that watching a nefarious ne'er-do-well pay the ultimate price for his misdeeds can sometimes be a thrill in a story well told. But that's not because I enjoy seeing people die; it's because I believe in justice. Crime doesn't pay, and villains should never win.

I shouldn't need to say this, but Superman isn't a villain.

Maybe Suicide Squad: Kill the Justice League has some great gameplay mechanics and stunning graphics. But any story that warps the Man of Steel into a selfish monster deserving of execution is not one that I want to read, much less play. That's not a game; that's a tragedy.

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Has it really been three weeks since I last mentioned movies? Let's fix that!

25/2034. Aurora Teagarden Mysteries: Haunted by Murder (2022)
Oh, no, is the murderer a... g-g-ghost? No, Shaggy. No it is not. Mom solved this one in the first thirty minutes by simply identifying the least likely suspect. I'm thinking maybe this series is running out of steam.

26/2035. Viva Knievel! (1977)
Have I really not reviewed this movie yet? I feel like I have. And if I haven't, shame on me. It's everything you could want in a Dukes of Hazzard episode plus Gene Kelly in his single worst on-screen performance ever. (When you are being out-acted by a motorcycle stuntman, it's time to hang it up.) The perfect example of a movie so bad it comes out the other side.

27/2036. Free Guy (2021)
I liked it. The script and the director (and Ryan Reynolds) were aware enough of the hows and whys video games are made to maintain their strong satirical point amid the excesses and oversimplifications necessary in crafting a "blockbuster" comedy-actioner for mass market audiences. Kudos.

Drink Coke! (Free Guy)
Gaming goes better with Coke!

28/2037. Mortal Kombat (2021)
This, on the other hand. I mean, it doesn't have an exemplary plot or action sequences, there's no significant characterization, the actors are made of wood, and the dialogue couldn't be worse. On the up side, it was helpful to be reminded why I don't play the Mortal Kombat games anymore.

More to come.

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For the record, Keith, I've found an RPG I hate more than any of The Witchers.

Final Fantasy XV suuuuuuucks.

In the mood for a story-driven RPG and a fan of previous games in the series, I picked it up on in a recent digital sale. The story setup is good. The environment is pretty. But the disappointment set in pretty quickly because those are the only two good things I can say about it. It has terrible gameplay and worse storytelling.

According to online game guides, the game has 15 chapters. I put the game down at Chapter 6. Then, a month later, I picked it back up and slogged on, much to my own detriment. Each chapter proved dumber and more frustrating than the one before it. Final Fantasy XV isn't a game but a psychological experiment in masochism. I finally threw in the towel at the end of Chapter 13 (and deleted the game and all my saves from my system) despite realizing that both Chapters 14 and 15 must be better if only because they couldn't possibly be worse.

Oh, well, they can't all be winners. At least I know that the next game I play can't be worse.

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