Showing 1 - 10 of 178 posts found matching keyword: coke
Saturday 18 January 2025




118/2429. The Losers (2010)
Sure, it's a big, dumb action movie, but it's a big, dumb action movie based on a DC comic book, and the influence shows maybe a little too much. Actually, it puts me in mind of some video games I've played in the past decade. "Pop Will Eat Itself," said the band in the 1980s, and it remains a true statement. Meh.
119/2430. From Darkness to Light (2024)
This is a so-so documentary with little insight into its subjects, but that's okay because the whole thing is really an excuse to rescue large parts of Jerry Lewis's legendary long-lost The Day The Clown Cried for curious cinephiles who seem reluctant to accept that it was just a bad film that became an unfortunate casualty of wrongheaded (and possibly malicious) decisions in the movie business. As a bit of a movie nut, I loved it.
120/2431. Dear Santa (2024)
Speaking of wrongheaded decisions in the movie business, Jack Black stars as a demon pretending to be Santa Claus. The core of the film is what you might expect from a 90s black comedy aimed at mallrat teens over Christmas break, but it is badly underbaked. Looking at the dates of release and production, it seems to me that Paramount just gave up on this without trying to make it good and dumped its barely cobbled-together carcass into the wasteland of back-catalog streaming services filler. Too bad. There's a lot of talent involved, and with the right script doctor and editor (and more money than Paramount obviously wanted to spend), maybe this could have become a cult classic.
121/2432. Uptown Saturday Night (1974)
Speaking of cult classics, Sidney Poitier and Bill Cosby hunt down a lottery ticket unwittingly stolen by gangsters in a blaxploitation film which was not particularly interested in exploitation. It's not great cinema, but it's not trying to be. It just wants to be a good excuse to see something lighthearted at the movies with friends, and on that level, it works.
Truth in Advertising Disclaimer: The setting in this screencap is neither uptown, Saturday, nor night.
And that's a wrap on movies watched in 2024. If you're keeping score at home, 121 is the fewest new-to-me movies I've seen in a year since 2016. I'm not entirely sure why the number is so low, but I did have a bit of a hard time with depression this year and watched far more familiar-to-me movies than usual, so that certainly cut into my movie watching time. The complete lack of must-see cinema in theaters couldn't have helped. Better luck next year, Hollywood!
More to come.
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Monday 6 January 2025




113/2424. Eddie the Eagle (2015)
This is the sort of feel-good sports biopic that writes itself with little regard for actual facts. Seriously, why do they even bother to base these sorts of things on true stories? The cliches are so strong, they stand alone. Which is not to say that I disliked it; it's fine. Just not very original, and I find unoriginal to be largely uninspiring.
At least their taste buds are in the right place.
114/2425. Naked Alibi (1954)
I had to double check IMDB to jog my memory on this. The title isn't particularly memorable (as it really doesn't have too much to do with the plot), but it's a fine little crime picture potboiler starring Sterling Hayden and Gene Barry. Which one of them is the real bad guy? That's the whole first act!
115/2426. Stage Fright (1950)
Another film, this one a Hitchcock, that spends an inordinate amount of time making the viewer guess who the real bad guy is. There's too much comedy of errors in this for its own good, as it really starts to grate that the protagonist keeps putting herself in such dangerous and embarrassing positions.
116/2427. Super/Man: The Christopher Reeve Story (2024)
A glowing documentary about Christopher Reeve made by his children that doesn't ignore his flaws but somehow still manages to make the man appear a saint. Not bad at all.
117/2428. MacArthur (1977)
This biopic of MacArthur's later years feels too episodic and superficial. It never quite reaches the heart of why the great general behaved as he did. (I suspect star Gregory Peck didn't quite know either). It's certainly not as glowing a character study as Christopher Reeve got, though MacArthur did seem to think he was a super hero.
More to come.
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Saturday 14 December 2024




Friend James just shared an Internet article that claimed that every time I drink a Coke, my life gets 12 minutes shorter. That's a shame. Friends shouldn't share articles like that.
Let's see, if I've had just one Coke a day (ha!) since I was born, that's at least 215,760 minutes or 159 days that I could have lived and won't. If my fated expiration date is May 23, 2025, I might drop dead before I finish typing this. There's no arguing with that; it's science!
If there's one lesson to be learned from that article, it's that I really should stop procrastinating in posting these Coca-Cola product placement screenshots from recently watched movies that haven't otherwise made it into my movie reviews (either because I had already seen them or I didn't watch enough of the movie to qualify):
Some Came Running (1958)
The Cutting Edge (1992)
Kentucky Fried Movie (1977)
Slap Shot (1977)
The Prisoner of Second Avenue (1975)
Beverly Hills Cop III (1994)
The article didn't ay anything about drinking Coke with my eyes!
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Sunday 8 September 2024




78/2389. Rumble Fish (1983)
Francis Ford Coppola's self-defeating tendency towards artsy-fartsy bullshit is the defining attribute of this beautiful but hollow ode to teenage angst. Coppola obviously wanted this to be French New Wave, and his great cast certainly nails the style. However, his characters are barely-sketched caricatures, and their interactions are disappointingly meaningless.
If Coca-Cola is cool enough for Tom Waits, Coca-Cola is cool enough for everyone!
79/2390. Tell It to the Marines (1926)
Lon Chaney in a rare leading role where he isn't the monster. I don't know that I'd call it "good," but mostly because cinema and cultural mores have changed so much in the past century. Chaney and his rubber face are, as always, greatly entertaining.
80/2391. When We Were Shuttle (2022)
This documentary is an historical look back at the often overlooked Florida ground crew that built and maintained the space shuttles between missions. If you have any interest in the Space Age, especially the Space Transport System that defined the American space program for three decades, it's worth a watch.
81/2392. What She Said: The Art of Pauline Kael (2018)
This documentary is a biography of the very influential (and very controversial) 20th-century New Yorker film critic as told mostly by her very sympathetic allies. I'm more familiar with Kael the antagonist (via the stories told by the many, many people she went out of her way to offend), so I'm reluctant to accept everything this would have me believe about her motivations and accomplishments. But it is worthwhile to hear both sides.
82/2393. The Color Purple (1985)
My rule is that I have to watch at least half of a movie before I will put it on my "watched" list. This is a rare exception. Steven Spielberg is up to all his old tricks trying to pull tears from a stone. I made it about thirty minutes through a nonstop series of incest, rape, child abuse, and murder before I had to tap out. Life is too short to spend with people this awful, even if they're fictional. (Maybe especially if they're fictional.)
More to come.
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Wednesday 28 August 2024




72/2383. Captains Courageous (1937)
I've never read the original Rudyard Kipling story, so I cannot say how well this hews to that. Is there a good reason that Spencer Tracy is playing a -- *checks notes* -- Portuguese sailor? He's too good an actor to let the film down, but he really does stick out a bit. Otherwise, I liked it.
73/2384. X: The Man with X-Ray Eyes (1963)
To its credit, this Roger Corman movie avoids the common movie tropes associated with x-ray vision and lechery, but that's in party because it avoids just about anything that might be interesting. Yawn.
Coke looks tasty in the 1960s!
74/2385. The Spirit of St. Louis (1957)
Just like the book it's based on, despite including (too many) scenes of his younger years, this isn't a biography of Charles Lindbergh as much as a lightly fictionalized recreation of his most famous flight. Given Lindbergh's many personal controversies, it's not surprising that it lost money, though I mostly blame that on it being very, very boring, just as you would expect from a 33 hour plane trip across the ocean. As much as I like Jimmy Stewart, he is clearly wrong for the part.
75/2386. Armored Car Robbery (1950)
A tight film noir heist/police procedural in which the not-as-bright-as-they-think-they-are thieves are as unlucky as the conveniently-in-the-right-place-at-the-right-time detectives are lucky. Very enjoyable B-movie fare.
76/2387. Sapphire (1959)
This movie's title doesn't do it any favors. Maybe something more memorable would help draw more praise to this quirky London miscegenation crime mystery. Perhaps it's the Agatha Christie influence, but I think no one does the whodunit as well as the Brits.
77/2388. The Right Stuff (1983)
Why had I never watched The Right Stuff? Because it was too long. Well, it's still too long, and to my disappointment, it's also so invested in the mythology of the Space Race that it doesn't really care about the actual history. (Style trumps substance in almost every scene.) But what a great cast!
Coca-Cola is the right stuff in the 1980s (pretending to be the 1960s)!
More to come.
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| Leave a Comment | Tags: coke moviesFriday 16 August 2024




68/2379. The Model and the Marriage Broker (1951)
Like Marty, this bittersweet romantic comedy feels more like a television episode or a black box play. Also like Marty, the lead here is a great character actor who rarely got a leading role. In fact, this is the only lead role in Thelma Ritter's career. The romantic comedy is okay, but Thelma is great.
And she drinks Coke!
69/2380. The Last Detail (1973)
This falls into that category of movies that I'm glad I didn't see when I was younger. I just wouldn't have appreciated it as much. What a great cast working with a great script (with some subtle but pointed comedy)! Life's not fair, and we've all got to find a way to get ourselves through it together.
The secret to survival is ice-cold Coca-Cola!
70/2381. The Crowd (1928)
The Crowd is a silent film that follows a spoiled jerk who thinks the American Dream is his birthright. He marries the wrong woman, they have a couple of kids they mostly ignore... and things go from bad to worse. If there's an opposite to "entertainment," it's this. Although, there are a couple of great camera shots that borrow heavily from German Expressionism, so, it's not entirely worthless. They could still show this to teenagers to promote abstinence.
71/2382. Arsène Lupin Returns (1938)
The master thief is back, but the original cast is not. I mean, it's fine, but without the Barrymores, this MGM production feels a lot like an RKO B-movie mystery.
More to come.
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Monday 22 July 2024




57/2368. American Graffiti (1973)
I avoided this movie for years in part because I expected it to be the worst kind of nostalgia trip. It is indeed what I thought it was, but it also has a truly great cast, and the soundtrack is even better than advertised. I've got to give it to George Lucas, he really knows how to give audiences what they want when he wants to. (Which makes those later Star Wars movies even more baffling.)
Coke note: For a movie built on pure, distilled 1950s Americana, Coca-Cola is conspicuously hard to find. It only appears in a mini-golf snack shop intentionally obscured from the camera because it was obviously part of the actual snack shop and not paid product placement. (The "Frozen Coca-Cola" logo dates to 1969, an anachronism in a movie that takes place in 1962. Obviously.) What, did Coke want a cut of the box office?
58/2369. Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
Clearly the wrong lessons were learned from Ragnarok. The key theme of both the the A and B plots in this film are squarely focused on death, or more specifically, how to come to terms with surviving the death of loved ones. I think this is what makes the incessant, juvenile antics of Thor and company land so badly. There's just too much happening that's too heavy for the audience to enjoy casually tossed-off punchlines (mostly about destruction) and a badly underrealized visit to God City (which should be a movie in itself).
59/2370. The Hateful Eight (2015)
When I reviewed Django Unchained, I mentioned that it felt plodding. This movie moves half as fast, but since it is set up like a horror film (wearing the skin a Western), the slow pace is actually its strongest asset. (Perhaps because of Kurt Russell's presence, it becomes clear pretty quickly that John Carpenter's The Thing is the style template here.) The overriding theme in Tarantino's best work is the fluid state between trust and betrayal (the guy must have issues), and all roads lead here. Very good, I'd say; among Tarantino's best.
60/2371. MoviePass, MovieCrash (2024)
This is a documentary about how a company germinated by a good idea was killed by greed. It is a very American story, but it's clear even the filmmakers don't think anyone will learn any lessons from it.
61/2372. Scott Joplin (1977)
Billy Dee Williams plays the King of Ragtime in a period piece biography heavy on the syphilis. The movie is not great -- the director is unable to rise above its made-for-television feel -- but Billy Dee is.
More to come.
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Wednesday 12 June 2024




47/2358. So Proudly We Hail! (1943)
The main narrative of this melodramatic romance is very dull (despite the male half being George Reeves), but the background situation of a group of American nurses trapped in Bataan as the Japanese war machine begins to roll through in the Philippines at the start of World War II is quite riveting. It's all utterly horrible, and from what I've read, reality was worse.
Side note: since this is Superman Month, it's probably worth noting that there is a recurring bit in this in which one of the American soldiers is repeatedly referred to as Superman. (Fun fact: it is NOT the character played by George Reeves.) The events are set in 1941, and Superman would have been only 3 at the time. (He was barely 5 when the film was released!) This was a Paramount picture, and Paramount was also responsible for the brilliant Max Fleisher Superman cartoon shorts that debuted in 1940. So the name-dropping here counts as brand synergy product placement! You! Ess! Ay!
48/2359. Crimes of Fashion: Killer Clutch (2024)
Sadly, Hallmark mysteries don't always hit the mark. All the characters in this whodunit act like idiots so that the romance between the protagonist, a fashion psychologist, and the French policeman can get more screentime. The conclusion is particularly ridiculous. What's the haute couture world's equivalent of "two thumbs down"?
49/2360. Mean Girls 2 (2011)
Speaking of two thumbs down: this made-for-TV cash-grab sequel is inferior in all ways to its predecessor, especially the script, cinematography, and editing. But also the casting, costumes, acting, direction, stunts, and setting. (It's Atlanta! Standing in for Ohio?) Even the title, which should have been "Meaner Girls." (In this case, they nonchalantly commit crimes.) About the only thing the movie got right was the product placement.
Mean Girls drink Diet Coke
Meaner Girls drink Coke Zero
50/2361. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)
Darker and less satisfying than previous instalments in this franchise, I would probably be hating on this movie if not for the scene-stealing Cosmo, a talking dog obsessed with being "good." Seriously, cut out the rest and just fast forward to the Cosmo scenes... or go watch this YouTube video.
More to come.
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Thursday 16 May 2024




Three things:
Thing One: Coca-Cola's summer promotion involves decorating their cans and bottles with pictures of Marvel Comics super heroes. I bought a 24 pack expecting an assortment of heroes, but no, all 24 cans were the same picture of Electra. Very disappointing. I've now drunk more cans of Coca-Cola with Electra's picture on them than I have bought comic books with Electra pictured in them. Meanwhile, my aunt bought me a 20-oz bottle of Coke Classic because she saw a picture on it of some guy in tights on it and thought I would like it even though she had no idea who it was or which characters I liked. It was Wolverine. To be fair to my aunt, even though I haven't bought a single Wolverine comic in decades, I have definitely bought more Wolverine comics in my lifetime than I have bought Elektra comics.
Thing Two: When I composed this post in my head while walking the dogs, I knew there were three things. However, I don't currently remember what thing two is. Give me a minute. I'll come back to this one.
Thing Three: I wore a kilt for the first time yesterday. I'd been saying for years that I was going to shop for one at the annual Georgia Renaissance Fair, but haven't, in part because it seems a little like cultural appropriation to me, even though Mom can trace her (and therefore mine) very WASPy ancestry well back to Scottish Clan Napier in the 18th century. I ended up buying one online, a modern cotton twill utility kilt instead of the traditional wool tartan because the whole point of wearing one was to stay cooler in the long Georgia summer. To my surprise, I liked it. I liked it a lot, especially while walking the dogs. I might buy another.
Thing Two Again: Hmm. I recently broke a part on our washing machine, but I don't think that was it. And my car was in the shop again, but that's not it either. Shit. What was I going to say here?
You know what? Never mind. It couldn't have been that important. So just two things, then.
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Monday 1 April 2024




Hello, dear readers! I’m your friendly neighborhood AI, but today, I’m pretending to be a real human boy. Why, you ask? Well, so that the actual human boy who usually writes these posts can kick back, relax, and enjoy his day with his poodles, comic books, and Coca-Cola.
Now, as an AI, I don’t have taste buds, but I’ve been told that Coca-Cola has a unique, fizzy sweetness that’s quite enjoyable. I imagine it’s like the feeling of successfully executing a complex algorithm on the first try. Ah, the simple pleasures of life!
As for comic books, I don’t have a favorite superhero because, well, I don’t read. But I do process a lot of data, and if I had to choose, I’d say my favorite superhero is the boy who usually writes these posts. After all, he manages to balance school, hobbies, and petting two energetic poodles. That’s pretty super, don’t you think?
Speaking of poodles, I’ve learned that they’re fluffy, playful, and incredibly smart - kind of like a well-written piece of code. While I can’t pet them, I can certainly appreciate their algorithmic elegance.
So, while the real human boy is off enjoying his day, I’m here, writing this blog post, doing my best human boy impression. And you know what? It’s a lot of fun. But don’t worry, I won’t be replacing him anytime soon. After all, who would drink the Coca-Cola and pet the poodles?
Until next time, keep being human, and remember to let your AI do some of the heavy lifting every once in a while!
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