I'm dogsitting two young poodles who have a very different idea than I do about when bedtime and breakfast should be. Who will win this battle of wills? I will, but maybe only because I'll eventually be too tired to wake up and let them out.

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80/2650. Central Park (1932)
You could call this a run of the mill "slice of life" film focused on the people who cross paths in New York's Central Park, assuming your mill was populated by insane murderers, runaway tigers, beauty queen con artists, and the mob. TV Tropes reports this contains one of the earliest examples of "Retirony." In this case, poor cop Charlie is just one week away from his pension when... well, I did mention the insane murderers and the mob, right?

81/2651. Brass Target (1978)
An alternate history conspiracy movie that dares to ask the question: What if the auto accident that killed George Patton was orchestrated by disloyal army officers trying to cover up a gold heist? The answer involves a gun that fires broken machine parts. Don't go giving people ideas, Hollywood!

82/2652. Colossal (2016)
I didn't finish it. I watched as much as I could of Anne Hathaway "acting" like a self-destructive idiot until her friend group of self-destructive losers doubled down and I couldn't take it anymore. I read an online plot summary, and I got out while the getting out was still good.

83/2653. The Street Fighter (1974)
"Street fighter" Terry Sugury is established as a true asshole mercenary who kills clients who don't pay and sells women into the sex trade but draws the line at working a Yakuza assassination, instead vowing to defend the intended victim. She is kidnapped and he is nearly beaten to death in an attempted rescue. The climactic battle takes place on a boat in a rainstorm, and it is epic. Great grindhouse cinema.

Drink up, Terry.

84/2654. Return of the Street Fighter (1974)
"Street fighter" Terry Tsurugi — he's in three different movies in one year, and all three spell it differently — is up to his old tricks crushing the vocal cords of would-be mob informants until the yakuza decides he is the bigger danger and tries to have him killed. It's not as good as the first but is still plenty of fun thanks to its ridiculously over-the-top violence and gore.

Hide from the cops, Terry.

(I previously covered the ridiculous third Street Fighter movie here. There's no Coke in that one.)

More to come.

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FYI: My power was out again yesterday.

Lights went out just after 5PM and came on again around 7PM, so it wasn't the longest outage, it just came at a bad time on one of the hottest days of the year. And, of course, it was the second outage in eight days.

What caused it? No idea. I drove around the neighborhood and saw no sign. Did someone cut down a tree? Georgia Power's notification said it was caused by "storm damage." On a cloudless, sunny day. With no wind. Sure, okay. Maybe lingering from last week, I guess.

It's hard to pretend we aren't living in end times when I'm starting to master the art of kerosene lamp maintenance.

UPDATE 4:40PM: My power is out again today!

Two days in a row, three outages in nine days. And counting. At least this time a thunderstorm really did pass through, so now's the time for yesterday's excuse, (increasingly misnamed) Georgia Power.

If the housing market wasn't so fucked up, we'd start looking for a new house. I'm so mad, I'm ready to start voting for some Democratic Socialists!

UPDATE 7:10PM: Estimated time of restoration is 9PM. I just took the boys for a walk around the neighborhood (better than sitting in my 80° house, I figured) and there are limbs down everywhere. So you get a pass this time, Georgia Power. There's nothing you can do against Mother Nature (except maybe proactively cut down more limbs or bury power lines or cut back on your fossil fuel plants). Nothing.

UPDATE 2:56AM: Power! (Just thought you'd like some closure.)

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I know they tell me I shouldn't be worried about invasive Joro spiders here in Georgia, but is no one else concerned that they spin one of the the strongest webs in the world and multiple Joro spiders hang out in the same web? Foreign gangs with nets hanging around just outside my garage? Between this and the rise of AI, I'm definitely not enjoying living in the future as much as I thought I would.

UPDATE: The morning after I posted this, I opened the back door to discover that a Joro spider had spun a giant web covering the doorway. He was just waiting for me to step out.... Is it still called paranoia if they really are out to get you?

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Ok, ok. I've been doing a lot of complaining lately. So let's make this a happy post! Instead of complaining, I'll say something nice about something, like, um, maybe....

...

...

Oh, fuck it. I'll try again next time.

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