40/2610. The Naked Gun (2025)
Do you remember how they used to say that Airplane! ruined Leslie Neilson's career? Will this do the same for Liam Neeson's post-Taken money train? In any case, it's a worthy successor to the Zucker/Abrams/Zucker originals (superior, even to 33-1/3), but it stuck in my craw that this movie that does not shy away from poking many other influences with a sharp stick never mentions the fact that it's core plot is essentially the same as The Kingsman.

54/2624. Take This Job and Shove It (1981)
It so happens that I watched this about a month before David Allen Coe died, and I'm glad I did so that I had that mental reference when reading his obituary. The film suffers from a weak budget and some rather obvious re-editing, presumably to make a messy script work, but I'm happy to say it's plenty of fun as a silly working-class comedy of its era.

Although Take This Job and Shove It is drenched in beer, there's still time for the Pause that Refreshes! I suspect the Coca-Cola soda fountain in the background of one of the protagonist's many internal struggles between his professional and personal ideologies was already installed in the shooting location as opposed to paid product placement, but much of the plot is made of the cultural value of American brands (which I found somewhat ironic in an age where Budweiser is owned by a Belgian conglomerate), so it's possible that this obvious bit of background imagery could be intended by the director as an intentional, somewhat subtle in the context of the film, reinforcement of the Good Ol' USA.

41/2611. Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore (1974)
TCM airs this all the time, so I finally made myself watch it. I'm glad I did. It's very good, an atypical Scorsese movie that proves he's capable of so much more than just gangster films.

Speaking of questionable product placement, there's no way that the Coca-Cola Company approved their IP being used in a gory death scene, which reinforces that the dead man being a lazy Coca-Cola delivery driver was probably a choice by Scorsese to dramatize the pitfalls of the commercialization of the American Dream, a key element in spurring Alice's Campbellian hero's journey of self discovery. In other words, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a (bloody) Coke!

42/2612. Operation Crossbow (1965)
A pre-cursor to the formula perfected by The Dirty Dozen, the Brits and Americans work together on a suicide mission to scuttle the German rocket program. Sophia Loren gets top billing for a small and completely pointless part that exists only to attract (and, I'm sure, disappoint) her fans.

More to come.

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55/2487. Murder in the Fleet (1935)
You might think that a battleship would make for a tightly locked room murder mystery, but the bigger mystery might be how so many people got on-board this ship! Sadly, the reveal hinges on an insane killer who was only pretending to be sane earlier in the film. It feels like a cheat because it is.

56/2488. Bullet Train (2022)
There are several mysteries on board this Tarantino-inspired Brad Pitt action vehicle, the foremost of which is why are so many professional killers on the same train? Honestly, I found the plot and characters more satisfying than the action, which often feels too cartoonishly CGI. To be clear, I enjoyed it. A lot, actually. But the later it gets, the more outlandish it is, and as I've made very clear, my suspension of disbelief only stretches so far.

57/2489. Run & Gun (2022)
This is one of those low-budget Tarantino-inspired films that really doesn't know what it wants to be. There are a couple of clever ideas at the core of the script, but those are let down by the technical imitations of... just about everyone involved except maybe Richard Kind, who really acts as though he's in an entirely different movie.

58/2490. What Happens Later (2023)
Meg Ryan and David Duchovny are the stars of this could-have-been-a-play, but my favorite character is the magical PA announcer of the fantasy airport the protagonists are trapped in. The film is not as insightful or engaging as it wants to be, but it is charming.

59/2491. Masterminds (2016)
What was I doing in 2016 that I missed this movie? Zach Galifianakis, Owen Wilson, Kristen Wiig, Jason Sudeikis, Kate McKinnon, Leslie Jones, and Ken Marino in a comedy directed by Napoleon Dynamite's Jared Hess? Yes, please! I'm happy to report that it's exactly as stupid and funny as I wanted it to be.

More to come.

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92/2403. Nikki & Nora: Sister Sleuths (2022)
Mom gave up on this Hallmark Mystery Movie early (and often). I'm not quite sure what she hated so much about it. Yes, the plot is silly and contrived with two sisters who... are also silly and contrived. But "Silly and Contrived" is pretty much the Hallmark brand, isn't it? I thought it was fine. Not great. Just fine.

93/2404. Split Second (1953)
The title of this surprisingly taut drama about a hostage situation in a very unfortunate location isn't doing it any favors, but honestly neither would the more accurate "The Petrified Forest But Set at Ground Zero." Of course, The Petrified Forest also had the on-screen star power Humphrey Bogart, Bette Davis, and Leslie Howard, while the biggest star of Split Second is Dick Powell behind the camera in his directorial debut. All of which is to say that Split Second is passable entertainment that knows better than to overstay its welcome, even if it doesn't manage to be particularly memorable.

94/2405. The Seventh Victim (1943)
The first half of this would lead you to believe that it's a murder mystery, but then it shifts gears into either psychological or supernatural horror (depending on the scene and the characters in it) and then it ends with an off-screen suicide maybe? I've read that much of the script for this was left behind on the cutting room floor, which I can believe, because there are just too many holes in the schizophrenic plot for it to be remotely satisfying. [NOTE: I didn't realize until later that I had previously watched this back in 2014. That's how memorable it is.]

95/2406. Curious Caterer: Foiled Plans (2024)
Silly and contrived? Check and double check. This one is a bit of a locked room mystery, and I love locked room mysteries. I didn't love this one, though, maybe because I've read too many great locked room mysteries to be impressed by mediocre ones. More often than not, it feels like the "locked room" aspect is merely a response to the need to keep the budget down.

96/2407. Hamburger Hill (1987)
This movie spends so much time trying to be an honest presentation of what it felt like to be a sausage in the meat grinder of the Vietnam War that it somehow fails to be entertaining. Was the goal to give the audience PTSD for watching your movie? Mission accomplished.

More to come.

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Movies watched in 2019: the final batch.

209. (1648.) Bumblebee (2018)
Surprise, surprise: it is possible to make a good live-action Transformers movie! No, really, it's a great combination of coming-of-age and buddy action pictures, intentionally evocative of the best of the Love Bug movies. Wriphe endorsed!

210. (1649.) Jojo Rabbit (2019)
If Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse was my favorite film watched in 2019, this is my favorite movie released in the year 2019. I'm so glad it was nominated for Best Picture Oscar. More people need to see it. (In fact, it is be re-released in theaters this weekend. If you haven't seen it yet, consider going. You won't regret it.)

211. (1650.) Made in U.S.A. (1987)
I watched this indie cross-country road picture via TCM Underground, and that was a perfect place for it. The plot, such as it is, doesn't make a lot of sense and there isn't a great payoff, but it is definitely some sort of adventure.

No matter how far you are off the beaten path, there's Coke!

212. (1651.) Bundle of Joy (1956)
This is the Debbie Reynolds musical remake of Ginger Rogers' Bachelor Mother. The original movie is so much better. Don't watch this one.

213. (1652.) Office Christmas Party (2016)
Completely predictable, but not without its chuckles. Besides, who really wants a truly chaotic Christmas party.

Oddly, no one in the entire movie actually drinks a soda.

214. (1653.) The Opposite Sex (1956)
Sex comedy, 1950s style: Yawn. Leslie Nielsen leaves his wife for a starlet who cheats on him, so the ex-wife plots to steal her old husband back. Why, lady? He's obviously not that great a catch.

215. (1654.) This Could Be the Night (1957)
Not a great title for an otherwise charming film. A young teacher takes a job in a strip joint and soon charms everyone, including the audience. A good way to send out 2019.

More to come.

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Late in the season, I'm way off the pace for movies in 2019, and it only gets worse as we get to the end of the football season. I've only got two eyes!

Anyway, here is the final batch of movies watched in October:

186. (1625.) Ghost World (2001)
I think I really enjoy coming-of-age movies more when they are based on comic books. Fantastic stuff here, really. Especially that ambiguous ending.

187. (1626.) This Gun for Hire (1942)
The original story of a hit man with a heart of gold! No, not really. He's actually kind of a jerk, but he does have a legit beef against some crooks worse than he is. Highlight here is Robert Preston as a crack-shot cop.

188. (1627.) The Phantom Carriage (1921)
Swedish silent film about paying for your sins in the afterlife. Great atmosphere if light on actual plot. Highlight here is the bit of trivia that the axe-through-the-door scene was the inspiration for a similar shot in The Shining.

189. (1628.) The Sheepman (1958)
Glenn Ford goes so far out of his way to play a cad that it's nearly impossible to accept that he would end up with town hot potato Shirley MacLaine in the end. Highlight here is Leslie Neilsen as a villainous cowpoke.

190. (1629.) Atomic Blonde (2017)
This very stylish action film wants to be John Wick, but the unreliable narrator aspect and resulting questionable reality are a detriment. Highlight is the 80s soundtrack.

191. (1630.) Here Come the Nelsons (1952)
This film uses a traditional sit-com setup, so it feels like a long TV episode. Highlight is that it is the first visual adventure of Ozzie and Harriet and family.

192. (1631.) The Dawn Patrol (1938)
Always-smiling Errol Flynn and his real life best pal, David Niven, leads their WWI flying aces into combat and inevitable deaths! Highlight is the chemistry between the leads.

More to come.

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When last I listed some movies watched, I only listed six. I've got such a backlog, I don't know why I stopped so short. (Perhaps because six is how many it takes to get an eggroll. Har, har.) Therefore, today you get eight!

117. (1556.) Ransom! (1956)
As you can tell by the exclamation point, this is the original, not the Mel Gibson remake. It's much better than that one, in part because you never even meet the kidnappers. You really don't know what's going to become of the kid. Suspenseful with an extra helping of "serious" actor Leslie Nielsen.

118. (1557.) Woman in the Moon (1929)
There's a short list of directors I'll watch anything by, and Fritz Lang is on that list, even though his greatest movies are silents. This one is a third spy film, a third science fiction, and a third nutso. It would be better if it moved faster, but it's worth it for Lang's unique vision.

119. (1558.) Money Monster (2016)
George Clooney plays a television stock market pundit with no redeeming values. However, because he's George Clooney, you really want him to win out when he becomes the victim of a kidnapping. The movie has several obvious flaws but manages to overcome them with dramatic momentum earned by its lead actors.

120. (1559.) War of the Worlds (1953)
No, really, I'd never seen this classic. Sure, I'd heard the radio production many times, but I wasn't aware that the movie version had a genuine miracle save the Earth. It's a bit heavy handed. Special effects are great, though.

121. (1560.) Mystery 101: Playing Dead (2019)
This is the second in a series about a mystery-writing teacher who solves mysteries. I like Jill Wagner and the general concept, but this has a really messy and unsatisfying ending.

122. (1561.) Beat Street (1984)
Rappin', Breakin', and this would make an ideal box set for lovers of 80s rap exploitation movies. That guy has to exist somewhere. Hrm. Maybe he's me.

123. (1562.) Cold Turkey (1971)
Comedy by Dick Van Dyke and Bob Newhart, songs by Randy Newman! A seriously great movie about religion, exploitation, and human nature at the crossroads of Middle America.

124. (1563.) Desk Set (1957)
Stop me if this sounds familiar: Katherine Hepburn is a know-it-all and Spencer Tracy is a curmudgeon. I know, I know, but the formula works. There are no bad Katherine Hepburn + Spencer Tracy movies.

More to come.

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July movies, part 2 of 3:

116. (653.) Show Boat (1951)
I'm told that this isn't the best production of Show Boat, but I don' think I care. I think I've had it with Rodgers and Hammerstein. I don't find their music entertaining, and I typically find their stories somewhere between boring and depressing.

117. (654.) $ (1971)
Yup. The movie is named $, pronounced "dollars." The top billed stars are Warren Beatty and Goldie Hawn, but I tuned in for Gert Frobe! I've said before that I like heist films, and this definitely qualified both as a heist film and a film I like.

118. (655.) Hot Summer Night (1957)
Leslie Neilsen's career can rather cleanly be divided into two halves. His starring role here falls firmly in the first half. Good noir, but not great.

119. (656.) The Italian Job (1969)
This was the original Micheal Caine version, not the Marky Mark remake. It's more comedy than heist film, and except for the overly long Mini Cooper commercial in the third act, a lot of fun.

120. (657.) To Be or Not To Be (1942)
Jack Benny does what he can to protect Poland from the Nazis in World War II. What a great set-up for some jokes! Jack Benny still delivers.

121. (658.) The Picture of Dorian Gray (1945)
I started watching this on PBS a few months back, but didn't get to see the ending until it came on TCM earlier this month. It's a really good film. I doubt the book could be better. The best part of the film is seeing the portrait itself (although the amoral Lord Wotton runs a close second).

122. (659.) Super 8 (2011)
So J.J. Abrams thinks he's Stephen Spielberg? No sir, I don't like it.

123. (660.) The Big Broadcast of 1937 (1936)
I'd heard that Jack Benny didn't have much of a movie career, but this, the second Benny movie I saw this month proves that he was as funny on the big-screen as he was on the radio.

124. (661.) College Holiday (1936)
Even more Jack Benny (and Burns & Allen). This film is a lot weaker than the previous two Benny movies (the plot barely exists and is only there to link the songs and gags), but he's still plenty impressive. If you like comedy, give a Jack Benny movie a shot.

More movies coming soon. (For the record, Jack Benny wasn't the only actor I saw three times this month. I'll tell you who the other three are next post.)

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And this is everything else I watched in June, my catch-all category, I guess.

89. (396.) Evan Almighty (2007)
Chock full of name comedians and character actors, but still really, unforgivably terrible. I demand to know who thought any part of this movie was a good idea.

93. (400.) It Came from Beneath the Sea (1955)
Stop motion horror animation by the recently deceased Ray Harryhausen. Not exactly must-see material — what this film really lacks is a proper ending — but the special effects do look far more convincing than what you might see in Zack Snyder's CGI movies these days.

95. (402.) Stranger Than Fiction (2006)
Dustin Hoffman plays a supporting role in both Huckabees and this metafictional film, the two of which were my favorite movies in June. Coincidence? I'm naming Hoffman my Star of the Month. (Seriously, I'm no big fan of Maggie Gyllenhaal, but I didn't even mind her in this film.) Also recommended.

99. (406.) Libeled Lady (1936)
A classic 30s screwball comedy with Myrna Loy, William Powell, Spencer Tracy, and Jean Harlow. I know that Harlow was the big sex symbol of her day, but it's really Loy who sizzles onscreen. Also also recommended.

100. (407.) The Return of Peter Grimm (1935)
Not too long ago, I watched On Borrowed Time and The Cockeyed Miracle. This film is essentially the same story (dead man intervenes in the lives of the still-living), but manages to make it exceedingly boring. Next time Peter Grimm goes away, I hope he'll stay there.

101. (408.) How to Steal the World (1968)
A movie made out of the final episodes of The Man from U.N.C.L.E.. The highlight of the movie is the opening title sequence. I don't mean that to be snarky; the opening title sequence is really a lot of fun. It's not that the rest of the movie isn't entertaining, it's just slow-developing with a lot of improbable sequences, such as when heroes Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin escape a firing squad because, well, just because. There's a particularly dumb scene where Leslie Nielsen is rendered mostly brain dead that must take 10 minutes.

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Finishing off the movies from September 2012:

223. Big Jake (1971)
John Wayne in a role that exemplifies why we love John Wayne. I loved the family dynamic of John Wayne, the last of the Old West heroes, telling his grown, estranged children what to do. I hated the fact that they rather violently killed a dog. Killing a beloved sidekick character? Joss Whedon must love this movie.

224. The Reluctant Astronaut (1967)
I have never much cared for Don Knotts. He plays just one character and I don't find that persona very entertaining. However, watching this film (with a straight-faced Leslie Nielson), I was struck that his schtick isn't much different from Kevin James' comic persona these days. Think about it: Don Knotts as Paul Blart: Mall Cop? I wonder how Kevin James would have gotten along in Mayberry.

225. What's Your Number (2011)
Romantic comedies like this are so formulaic, I don't really know why I watch them. Seriously, someone in an awkward romantic situation meets someone of the opposite gender in a very contrived situation. The fall in love while working to resolve the awkward situation. Then the protagonist does something stupid, driving a wedge in the budding relationship. Fortunately, some friends or situation points out the foolishness of the situation, and all live happily ever after. I guess that I, like most moviegoers, feel comfortable seeing new variations on familiar themes, and just keep consuming these movies like visual comfort food. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

226. Diner (1982)
Sometimes I can tell when I really liked a movie only when it sticks with me as time passes. I've thought a lot about Diner since I saw it, which is a pretty good indicator that I liked it. It reminded me of a less-serious Beautiful Girls, which I've always liked.

227. Doom (2005)
Stupid, pop-culture action movie. I watched it to prep me for Karl Urban's performance in...

228. Dredd (2012)
I covered this here. As I said, I liked it. Much smarter than Doom. Hard to believe that's Dr. McCoy scowling under that helmet.

229. Without a Paddle (2004)
How do movies like this get made? The situationally "comedic" plot is as thin as the direction. It's just a time waster. If the romantic comedy is the comfort food of movies, this is the fast food of movies.

230. Comanche Territory (1950)
Commanche Territory is the sort of film that gave Doc Brown the wrong idea about the American West in Back to the Future III. I watched the movie because the early meeting between the two male leads looked like it had the sort of sparkle that would make for a good time. The movie soon disappointed by devolving into a stock Western with dubious historical facts, weak action, and an unlikely romance. Oh well. They can't all be Fistful of Dollars.

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Of course, the whole reason Trey, Leslie, and I went to Ohio was so that Trey could attend a professional soccer match between the Columbus Crew and the visiting Chicago Fire.

I have to admit that I had more fun at the soccer game than I had thought I would. The atmosphere was enjoyably electric, and even the soccer match was unusually exciting so far as soccer games go. (The first goal was scored within the first 9 minutes, preventing the 0-0 tie I was expecting.) The Columbus fans were friendly and reasonably well-behaved, the exception being their children. Those little bastards went largely unsupervised and seemed to enjoy throwing their Pepsi cups and other trash between sections. Clearly, they are future Ohio State University students.

Naturally, with no preference between teams, I chose to root for the Crew. Trey claimed to have no favorite MLS soccer team, but Leslie insisted that he is secretly a Chicago Fire fan. The Chicago fans made the Columbus children look like amateurs, throwing smoke bombs and bottles on the field. There was even a fire in the parking lot after the Fire lost, an event I don't consider a coincidence. I'm sure that Trey felt like he was attending a Philadelphia Eagles game.

So that was my first soccer game. Would I do it again? Yeah. Maybe next time, we can go to a stadium that serves Coke.

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